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Fan-made Summary - Story - chapter 10 : AFK v5.5

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cidjen
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Fan-made Summary - Story - chapter 10 : AFK v5.5

Post by cidjen » Sat Jan 20, 2018 9:16 pm

Hey, not sure where this actually fits, but I felt the need to write a condensed version for the Megatokyo / Story page ... pls don't shoot me if this does not belong here ;)

v5.5 : slight edit

v5.0 : yet another attempt at more condensed resume. Looks like it now could condense to less than a page of text, if excessive gap lines are removed, but not doing it here for to not turn it into a wall of text. Added bold to the title so it's more apparent where the changelog ends, and text starts.

v4.0 : attempt at slightly more non-linear condensation

V3.0+ : changed title as suggested by Sackett, thanks!

v3: All the while, it was much much too long. It's supposed to be condensed ... contributions to condense more are welcome :)
(previous version will be re-posted as a reply in this thread)

v2: tweaks and paragraphs by Ningen, thank you!
also added : lost line about Yuki reading the chat logs, removed in v2.1, redundant.
also s/bouncers / Kenji and Komugiko

Chapter 10 : A.F.K.

Piro and Kimiko talk about possibly getting Piro a job at Lockart.

An after-school encounter between Largo, Junko and Ping is disrupted by Ping's translation module still malfunctioning after Largo's 'reference material' overload. Junko, appalled by how Largo treats Ping, storms off, and Ping follows her and rescues from a nearly-certain accident. Afterwards when Junko and Ping talk in a cafe, Ping manages to finally explain what she is, and Junko suggests Ping to post photos and videos she made while staying with Miho, to the Internet.

Yutaka reveals to Yuki the existence of material posted by Ping.
During dinner at Sonodas' house with Erika and Largo, Yuki chats with Yutaka, and decides that she wants to go the Cave of Evil to look for Miho. Largo sets up a distraction to allow Yuki to set off.

At the same time, Piro and Kimiko work on Piro's portfolio. Piro calls Largo's phone when, members of NPC interfere in his computer. Yuki (who borrowed Largo's phone) takes the call, reveals to Piro the presence of Miho's 'embarrassing photos' posted by Ping.

Piro reveals presence of Miho's photos and their chat history, on his old laptop, and then explains to Kimiko (and Yuki eavesdropping) why he feels about Miho the way he does.

Kimiko decides to use her free Cave of Evil pass to look for Miho. Largo and Erika also decide to go to the Cave of Evil.
Looking at the online response to Ping's postings, Junko decides to confront her father, who also went to the Cave of Evil, and Ping follows her, only to become Ed's target again.

Yuki is intercepted by Kenji at the entrance of the Cave of Evil and reunited with Yutaka. In CoE office, Yuki reads the chat logs off Piro's laptop that she's stolen earlier.

Yuki departs CoE and finds Miho at the Analog Support Facility. While Yuki tries to talk to Miho about her and Piro's feelings, Miho taunts Yuki and causes her to drag Miho to the Cave of Evil.

In the chaos that ensues, Ibara senior (Junko's father) neutralizes Ed, and Largo blows up the club to facilitate everybody's escape.

Piro decides to go to the ASF, only to find Miho's room empty with signs of physical struggle.
Miho tries to go home, but finding it surrounded, turns around and goes in a different direction.
Last edited by cidjen on Tue Feb 27, 2018 8:14 am, edited 12 times in total.
Translation to polish
(Scanlations have now been deleted)

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Re: [fan contribution] Story - chapter 10 : AFK

Post by richvh » Sat Jan 20, 2018 10:09 pm

Next time, break it up into paragraphs. Walls o' text discourage reading. (People's eyes glaze over staring at it.)

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Re: [fan contribution] Story - chapter 10 : AFK

Post by Ningen » Sun Jan 21, 2018 4:57 am

Now with added paragraphs and a few tweaks. Feel free to use or discard as you see fit.


While Ping was sleeping, Largo added a cell-phone Internet connection to one of her earpads, and tweaks to the translation module, dissatisfied with quality of translation.

Piro talks with Kimiko on the phone and sets up a meeting with her during lunch time, then sets off when Erika arrives at the store.

Erika warns Largo that she intends to not be late for the evening with the Sonoda family. Largo sets off to school.

Piro and Kimiko start talking about possibly getting Piro a job at Lockart, but Ping interrupts their conversation to ask him (again) about Miho. In the presence of Kimiko Piro contains his anger, and tries to calm Ping down instead but fails.

Kimiko notices his expressions, and tries to clarify his view of Miho, but is interrupted by a member of Nanasawa Protection Coalition, hinting at her duty to go back to work. While departing, she sets the proposition to Piro, to work on his portfolio tonight.

Largo actually arrives at the school on time. Junko is called out to the head office, and on the way there, she meets Ping. Junko isn't impressed with how Ping's body and hair changed again. In the office, they meet Junko's father, who announces to her, that he's been let to work on a position he was trying to fill in for years, and he wants to borrow money. He notices Ping, and makes remarks about her purpose.

Fast forward to the end of Largo's lesson, Ping is asking a number of students about Miho, and is dismayed by the fact, that barely anybody seems to remember her, even though she's been missing for only 9 days. An encounter between Largo, Junko and Ping is disrupted by Ping's translation module still malfunctioning after Largo's 'reference material' overload.

Junko is appalled by how Largo treats Ping, as she (still) thinks, that Ping is the woman he's attracted to. Junko storms off, and Ping follows, trying to explain, but fails.

Distracted by Ping following, Junko almost ends up driven over by a delivery scooter. Ping rescues her by smashing the vehicle with a power pole. When Ping puts the pole back in its place, Junko sees Yuki running back home from school over the roofline.

Yuki is running because Meimi called her, having trouble with the shrunk Zombie-zilla (now dubbed Zom-zom) in the house, which she took pity on for being bound and chained. Yuki and Meimi start cleaning up the house after containing Zom-zom.

Junko and Ping talk in a cafe, Ping manages to finally explain to Junko, that she is a robot, designed for playing 'pure' love and relationship sim games.

Yuki and Meimi have finished cleaning up after Zom-zom, Asako and Mami arrive to study with Yuki.

Ping and Junko leave the cafe, Ping tells Junko about Miho's phone she found in the trash; Junko is aggravated by the seemingly repeated 'Miho stunt' that Miho keeps on pulling off on others; Junko suggests Ping to explore the 'wonders of social web' and to post Miho's photos and videos she made while staying with Miho, to the internet forums, social networks and video sites.

Yuki tries on to study with Asako and Mami, but Asako keeps being distracted by Yuki's earlier remark about the desire to do something more 'romantic'. Finally Mami reveals to Yuki that everybody knew for years, who Yuki's 'secret admirer' is. When Asako and Mami leave, Yuki discovers that Zom-zom ate her phone.

Yuki and Yutaka talk on the phone about her being a magical girl, and then about their ongoing search for Miho. Yutaka reveals to Yuki that just recently, user know by SEVS-44936 handle (that is Ping's handle) has posted photos and videos of Miho to the net.

Largo and Erika walk towards the Sonoda residence, Largo tries to change the subject when Erika wants to learn as to why Junko apologized to him so much.

Yuki and Yutaka find the geotags of where the photos of Miho were taken, which point to the Cave of Evil. During dinner, Yuki repeatedly uses her power of speed to run to her room and chat with Yutaka, and decides that she wants to go there. While Largo lets her borrow his cell phone, and deliberately sets his clothing on fire to distract the family, Yuki sets off.

Meanwhile Kimiko and Piro are working on his portfolio, with the members of NPC evidently 'assisting', which prompts Piro to call Largo. Yuki takes the call, reveals to Piro the presence of Miho's 'embarrassing photos' posted by Ping.

Piro, in panic, reveals existence of Miho's photos on his own old laptop, to both Kimiko and Yuki. Kimiko asks him to reveal what is it about his and Miho's history, which he does - while Yuki listens too, hidden in the merchandise. Piro relays the events of the Endgames story that led to exposing Miho as the perpetrator subsequently banned for hacking, while revealing the extent of his emotional engagement with Miho, and how he got hurt in the end.

Yuki departs for the Cave of Evil, thinking, that Piro is still in love with Miho. Kimiko departs for the train station but then decides to use her free Cave of Evil pass and find out what is going on with Miho. Largo and Erika also decide to go to the Cave of Evil.

On arrival, Yuki is intercepted by the bouncers and reunited with Yutaka, who has been caught earlier. Yuki and Yutaka manage to boot up Piro's laptop, where Yuki reads the chat logs of conversations between Piro and Miho.

Largo and Erika use Erika's 'power of fame' to enter the club without waiting in line.

Looking at the online response to Ping's postings, Junko realizes that one of the replies belongs to her own father, and decides to confront him in the Cave of Evil.

The bouncers order Yuki and Yutaka to sit in the office, while they observe how the situation with Erika, Largo, Ping and Kimiko develops. Dom attempts to convince Erika and Kimiko again to join his company, while Ed starts to hunt Ping.

Yuki decides to go off and find Miho at the Analog Support Facility. While Yuki tries to talk to Miho about her and Piro's feelings, Miho taunts Yuki and causes her to drag Miho to the Cave of Evil, into view of all people who know Miho.

In the chaos that ensues, Ibara senior (Junko's father) neutralizes Ed with his Wii remote and Tetris weapon, and Largo blows up the club to facilitate everybody's escape.

Piro decides to go to the ASF only to find Miho's room empty with signs of physical struggle. Largo and Erika continue their journey by train, having seen Miho go off, seemingly in direction of her home. Miho, seeing the fans surrounding the building, turns around and goes off in a different direction.
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Re: [fan contribution] Story - chapter 10 : AFK

Post by cidjen » Sun Jan 21, 2018 5:24 am

Yay thanks :) mod note : if you think this fits better in Fan Works, feel free to move.
Translation to polish
(Scanlations have now been deleted)

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Re: [fan contribution] Story - chapter 10 : AFK

Post by Invisigoth » Sun Jan 21, 2018 9:40 am

cidjen wrote:
Sun Jan 21, 2018 5:24 am
Yay thanks :) mod note : if you think this fits better in Fan Works, feel free to move.
This is fine here

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Re: [fan contribution] Story - chapter 10 : AFK v2.1

Post by cidjen » Mon Jan 22, 2018 7:24 am

v2: tweaks and paragraphs by Ningen, thank you!
also added : lost line about Yuki reading the chat logs, removed in v2.1, redundant.
also s/bouncers / Kenji and Komugiko

Chapter 10 : A.F.K.

While Ping was sleeping, Largo added a cell-phone Internet connection to one of her earpads, and tweaks to the translation module, dissatisfied with quality of translation.

Piro talks with Kimiko on the phone and sets up a meeting with her during lunch time, then sets off when Erika arrives at the store.

Erika warns Largo that she intends to not be late for the evening with the Sonoda family. Largo sets off to school.

Piro and Kimiko start talking about possibly getting Piro a job at Lockart, but Ping interrupts their conversation to ask him (again) about Miho. In the presence of Kimiko Piro contains his anger, and tries to calm Ping down instead but fails.

Kimiko notices his expressions, and tries to clarify his view of Miho, but is interrupted by a member of Nanasawa Protection Coalition, hinting at her duty to go back to work. While departing, she sets the proposition to Piro, to work on his portfolio tonight.

Largo actually arrives at the school on time. Junko is called out to the head office, and on the way there, she meets Ping. Junko isn't impressed with how Ping's body and hair changed again. In the office, they meet Junko's father, who announces to her, that he's been let to work on a position he was trying to fill in for years, and he wants to borrow money. He notices Ping, and makes remarks about her purpose.

Fast forward to the end of Largo's lesson, Ping is asking a number of students about Miho, and is dismayed by the fact, that barely anybody seems to remember her, even though she's been missing for only 9 days. An encounter between Largo, Junko and Ping is disrupted by Ping's translation module still malfunctioning after Largo's 'reference material' overload.

Junko is appalled by how Largo treats Ping, as she (still) thinks, that Ping is the woman he's attracted to. Junko storms off, and Ping follows, trying to explain, but fails.

Distracted by Ping following, Junko almost ends up driven over by a delivery scooter. Ping rescues her by smashing the vehicle with a power pole. When Ping puts the pole back in its place, Junko sees Yuki running back home from school over the roofline.

Yuki is running because Meimi called her, having trouble with the shrunk Zombie-zilla (now dubbed Zom-zom) in the house, which she took pity on for being bound and chained. Yuki and Meimi start cleaning up the house after containing Zom-zom.

Junko and Ping talk in a cafe, Ping manages to finally explain to Junko, that she is a robot, designed for playing 'pure' love and relationship sim games.

Yuki and Meimi have finished cleaning up after Zom-zom, Asako and Mami arrive to study with Yuki.

Ping and Junko leave the cafe, Ping tells Junko about Miho's phone she found in the trash; Junko is aggravated by the seemingly repeated 'Miho stunt' that Miho keeps on pulling off on others; Junko suggests Ping to explore the 'wonders of social web' and to post Miho's photos and videos she made while staying with Miho, to the internet forums, social networks and video sites.

Yuki tries on to study with Asako and Mami, but Asako keeps being distracted by Yuki's earlier remark about the desire to do something more 'romantic'. Finally Mami reveals to Yuki that everybody knew for years, who Yuki's 'secret admirer' is. When Asako and Mami leave, Yuki discovers that Zom-zom ate her phone.

Yuki and Yutaka talk on the phone about her being a magical girl, and then about their ongoing search for Miho. Yutaka reveals to Yuki that just recently, user know by SEVS-44936 handle (that is Ping's handle) has posted photos and videos of Miho to the net.

Largo and Erika walk towards the Sonoda residence, Largo tries to change the subject when Erika wants to learn as to why Junko apologized to him so much.

Yuki and Yutaka find the geotags of where the photos of Miho were taken, which point to the Cave of Evil. During dinner, Yuki repeatedly uses her power of speed to run to her room and chat with Yutaka, and decides that she wants to go there. While Largo lets her borrow his cell phone, and deliberately sets his clothing on fire to distract the family, Yuki sets off.

Meanwhile Kimiko and Piro are working on his portfolio, with the members of NPC evidently 'assisting', which prompts Piro to call Largo. Yuki takes the call, reveals to Piro the presence of Miho's 'embarrassing photos' posted by Ping.

Piro, in panic, reveals existence of Miho's photos on his own old laptop, to both Kimiko and Yuki. Kimiko asks him to reveal what is it about his and Miho's history, which he does - while Yuki listens too, hidden in the merchandise. Piro relays the events of the Endgames story that led to exposing Miho as the perpetrator subsequently banned for hacking, while revealing the extent of his emotional engagement with Miho, and how he got hurt in the end.

Yuki departs for the Cave of Evil, thinking, that Piro is still in love with Miho. Kimiko departs for the train station but then decides to use her free Cave of Evil pass and find out what is going on with Miho. Largo and Erika also decide to go to the Cave of Evil.

On arrival, Yuki is intercepted by the Kenji and reunited with Yutaka, who has been caught earlier. Yuki and Yutaka manage to boot up Piro's laptop, where Yuki reads the chat logs of conversations between Piro and Miho.

Largo and Erika use Erika's 'power of fame' to enter the club without waiting in line.

Looking at the online response to Ping's postings, Junko realizes that one of the replies belongs to her own father, and decides to confront him in the Cave of Evil.

Kenji and Komugiko order Yuki and Yutaka to sit in the office, while they observe how the situation with Erika, Largo, Ping and Kimiko develops. Dom attempts to convince Erika and Kimiko again to join his company, while Ed starts to hunt Ping.

After reading the Piro X Miho story from the chat logs, Yuki decides to go off and find Miho at the Analog Support Facility. While Yuki tries to talk to Miho about her and Piro's feelings, Miho taunts Yuki and causes her to drag Miho to the Cave of Evil, into view of all people who know Miho.

In the chaos that ensues, Ibara senior (Junko's father) neutralizes Ed with his Wii remote and Tetris weapon, and Largo blows up the club to facilitate everybody's escape.

Piro decides to go to the ASF only to find Miho's room empty with signs of physical struggle. Largo and Erika continue their journey by train, having seen Miho go off, seemingly in direction of her home. Miho, seeing the fans surrounding the building, turns around and goes off in a different direction.
Translation to polish
(Scanlations have now been deleted)

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Re: Fan-made Summary - Story - chapter 10 : AFK v3.0

Post by cidjen » Thu Jan 25, 2018 6:40 am

V3.0+ : changed title as suggested by Sackett, thanks!
v3: All the while, it was much much too long. It's supposed to be condensed ... contributions to condense more are welcome :)
(previous version will be re-posted as a reply in this thread)

v2: tweaks and paragraphs by Ningen, thank you!
also added : lost line about Yuki reading the chat logs, removed in v2.1, redundant.
also s/bouncers / Kenji and Komugiko

Chapter 10 : A.F.K.

While Ping was sleeping, Largo added a cell-phone Internet connection to one of her earpads, and tweaks to the translation module, dissatisfied with quality of translation.

Piro and Kimiko start talking about possibly getting Piro a job at Lockart, but Ping interrupts their conversation to ask him (again) about Miho. In the presence of Kimiko Piro contains his anger, and tries to calm Ping down instead but fails.

Largo actually arrives at the school on time. Junko is called out to the head office, and on the way there, she meets Ping. In the office, they meet Junko's father.

An encounter between Largo, Junko and Ping is disrupted by Ping's translation module still malfunctioning after Largo's 'reference material' overload.

Junko is appalled by how Largo treats Ping. Junko storms off, and Ping follows, trying to explain.
Ping rescues Junko from a nearly-certain accident, by smashing the vehicle with a power pole.

Yuki is running home to help Meimi clean up after her Zombie-zilla (now dubbed Zom-zom) got loose in the house.

Junko and Ping talk in a cafe, Ping manages to finally explain to Junko, that she is a robot, designed for playing 'pure' love and relationship sim games.

Yuki and Meimi have finished cleaning up after Zom-zom, Asako and Mami arrive to study with Yuki.

Junko suggests Ping to explore the 'wonders of social web' and to post Miho's photos and videos she made while staying with Miho, to the internet forums, social networks and video sites.

Mami reveals to Yuki that everybody knew for years, who Yuki's 'secret admirer' is. Yuki discovers that Zom-zom ate her phone.

Yutaka reveals to Yuki that just recently, user know by SEVS-44936 handle (that is Ping's handle) has posted photos and videos of Miho to the net.

During dinner, Yuki repeatedly uses her power of speed to run to her room and chat with Yutaka, and decides that she wants to go the Cave of Evil. While Largo lets her borrow his cell phone, and deliberately sets his clothing on fire to distract the family, Yuki sets off.

Piro calls Largo's phone when members of NPC interfere in his computer while he's working on his portfolio with Kimiko. Yuki takes the call, reveals to Piro the presence of Miho's 'embarrassing photos' posted by Ping.

Piro, in panic, reveals existence of Miho's photos on his own old laptop. Piro relays the events of the Endgames story, also revealing the extent of his emotional engagement with Miho, and how he got hurt in the end.

Yuki departs for the Cave of Evil. Kimiko departs for the train station but then decides to use her free Cave of Evil pass and find out what is going on with Miho. Largo and Erika also decide to go to the Cave of Evil.

On arrival, Yuki is intercepted by the Kenji and reunited with Yutaka, who has been caught earlier. Yuki reads the chat logs of conversations between Piro and Miho.

Largo and Erika use Erika's 'power of fame' to enter the club without waiting in line.

Looking at the online response to Ping's postings, Junko decides to confront her father who also went to the Cave of Evil.

Kenji and Komugiko observe how the situation with Erika, Largo, Ping and Kimiko develops. Dom attempts to convince Erika and Kimiko again to join his company, while Ed starts to hunt Ping.

After reading the Piro X Miho story from the chat logs, Yuki decides to go off and find Miho at the Analog Support Facility. While Yuki tries to talk to Miho about her and Piro's feelings, Miho taunts Yuki and causes her to drag Miho to the Cave of Evil.

In the chaos that ensues, Ibara senior (Junko's father) neutralizes Ed with his Wii remote and Tetris weapon, and Largo blows up the club to facilitate everybody's escape.

Piro decides to go to the ASF only to find Miho's room empty with signs of physical struggle. Largo and Erika continue their journey by train, having seen Miho go off, seemingly in direction of her home. Miho, seeing the fans surrounding the building, turns around and goes off in a different direction.
Translation to polish
(Scanlations have now been deleted)

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Re: Fan-made Summary - Story - chapter 10 : AFK v4.0

Post by cidjen » Tue Jan 30, 2018 9:42 am

Just posted : v5.0 as the first post in thread.

v4.0 : attempt at slightly more non-linear condensation
V3.0+ : changed title as suggested by Sackett, thanks!
v3: All the while, it was much much too long. It's supposed to be condensed ... contributions to condense more are welcome :)
(previous version will be re-posted as a reply in this thread)

v2: tweaks and paragraphs by Ningen, thank you!
also added : lost line about Yuki reading the chat logs, removed in v2.1, redundant.
also s/bouncers / Kenji and Komugiko

Chapter 10 : A.F.K.

While Ping was sleeping, Largo added a cell-phone Internet connection to one of her earblades and tweaked her english translation module.

Piro and Kimiko start talking about possibly getting Piro a job at Lockart. Ping interrupts their conversation to ask him (again) about Miho. In the presence of Kimiko Piro contains his anger, and tries to calm Ping down instead but fails.

Largo actually arrives at the school on time. Junko is called out to the head office, and on the way there, she meets Ping. In the office, they meet Junko's father.

An after-school encounter between Largo, Junko and Ping is disrupted by Ping's translation module still malfunctioning after Largo's 'reference material' overload.

Junko is appalled by how Largo treats Ping. Junko storms off, and Ping follows, trying to explain.
Ping rescues Junko from a nearly-certain accident, by smashing the vehicle with a power pole.

Junko and Ping talk in a cafe, Ping manages to finally explain to Junko, that she is a robot, designed for playing 'pure' love and relationship sim games.
Junko suggests Ping to explore the 'wonders of social web' and to post Miho's photos and videos she made while staying with Miho, to the internet forums, social networks and video sites.

Yuki and Meimi have finished cleaning up after Zom-zom, who got loose in the house.
Mami reveals to Yuki that everybody knew for years, who Yuki's 'secret admirer' is.

Yutaka reveals to Yuki that just recently, user know by SEVS-44936 handle (that is Ping's handle) has posted photos and videos of Miho to the net.

During dinner, Yuki chats with Yutaka, and decides that she wants to go the Cave of Evil to look for Miho.
Largo lets her 'borrow' his cell phone, and sets up a distraction to allow Yuki to set off.

Piro calls Largo's phone when members of NPC interfere in his computer.
Yuki takes the call, reveals to Piro the presence of Miho's 'embarrassing photos' posted by Ping.

Piro, in panic, reveals presence of Miho's photos on his own old laptop. Piro relays the events of the Endgames story, also revealing the extent of his emotional engagement with Miho, and how he got hurt in the end.

Yuki steals Piro's laptop and departs for the Cave of Evil.
Kimiko departs for the train station, but then decides to use her free Cave of Evil pass to look for Miho.
Largo and Erika also decide to go to the Cave of Evil.

Yuki is intercepted by the Kenji and reunited with Yutaka.
Yuki reads the chat logs of conversations between Piro and Miho.

Largo and Erika use Erika's 'power of fame' to enter the club without waiting in line.

Looking at the online response to Ping's postings, Junko decides to confront her father who also went to the Cave of Evil.

Dom attempts again to convince Erika and Kimiko to join his company, while Ed starts to hunt Ping.

After reading the Piro X Miho story from the chat logs, Yuki finds Miho at the Analog Support Facility.
While Yuki tries to talk to Miho about her and Piro's feelings, Miho taunts Yuki and causes her to drag Miho to the Cave of Evil.

In the chaos that ensues, Ibara senior (Junko's father) neutralizes Ed with his Wii remote and Tetris weapon, and Largo blows up the club to facilitate everybody's escape.

Piro decides to go to the ASF only to find Miho's room empty with signs of physical struggle.
Miho tries to go home, but seeing the fans surrounding the building, turns around and goes off in a different direction.
Translation to polish
(Scanlations have now been deleted)

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Re: Fan-made Summary - Story - chapter 10 : AFK v5.0

Post by cidjen » Tue Feb 27, 2018 8:15 am

Just posted v5.5 as top-post, this is a backup copy of v5.0
v5.0 : yet another attempt at more condensed resume. Looks like it now could condense to less than a page of text, if excessive gap lines are removed, but not doing it here for to not turn it into a wall of text. Added bold to the title so it's more apparent where the changelog ends, and text starts.

v4.0 : attempt at slightly more non-linear condensation

V3.0+ : changed title as suggested by Sackett, thanks!

v3: All the while, it was much much too long. It's supposed to be condensed ... contributions to condense more are welcome :)
(previous version will be re-posted as a reply in this thread)

v2: tweaks and paragraphs by Ningen, thank you!
also added : lost line about Yuki reading the chat logs, removed in v2.1, redundant.
also s/bouncers / Kenji and Komugiko

Chapter 10 : A.F.K.

Piro and Kimiko talk about possibly getting Piro a job at Lockart. Ping interrupts their conversation to ask him (again) about Miho. In the presence of Kimiko Piro contains his anger, and tries to calm Ping down instead, but fails.

An after-school encounter between Largo, Junko and Ping is disrupted by Ping's translation module still malfunctioning after Largo's 'modification' 'reference material' overload. Junko is appalled by how Largo treats Ping. Junko storms off, and Ping follows, trying to explain.
Ping rescues Junko from a nearly-certain accident, with her 'superhuman' robot powers.
Junko and Ping talk in a cafe, Ping manages to finally explain to Junko, that she is a robot, designed for playing 'pure' love and relationship sim games.
Junko suggests Ping to post photos and videos she made while staying with Miho, to the Internet.

Yutaka reveals to Yuki the existence of material posted by Ping.
During dinner at Sonodas' house with Erika and Largo, Yuki chats with Yutaka, and decides that she wants to go the Cave of Evil to look for Miho.
Largo lets her 'borrow' his cell phone, and sets up a distraction to allow Yuki to set off.

At the same time, Piro and Kimiko work on Piro's portfolio. Piro calls Largo's phone when, members of NPC interfere in his computer. Yuki takes the call, reveals to Piro the presence of Miho's 'embarrassing photos' posted by Ping.

Piro, in panic, reveals presence of Miho's photos and their chat history, on his laptop, to Kimiko and Yuki. He explains to Kimiko, with Yuki listening while hiding between boxes, why he feels about Miho as he does.

Kimiko departs for the train station, but then decides to use her free Cave of Evil pass to look for Miho.
Largo and Erika also decide to go to the Cave of Evil.
Looking at the online response to Ping's postings, Junko decides to confront her father who also went to the Cave of Evil.

Yuki goes to the Cave of Evil too, but is intercepted by the Kenji and reunited with Yutaka. In CoE office, Yuki breaks into Piro's laptop that she stole earlier at the flat, and reads the chat logs.

Dom attempts again to convince Erika and Kimiko to join his company, while Ed starts to hunt Ping, who turns to Erika and Largo for help.

Yuki finds Miho at the Analog Support Facility. While Yuki tries to talk to Miho about her and Piro's feelings, Miho taunts Yuki and causes her to drag Miho to the Cave of Evil.

In the chaos that ensues, Ibara senior (Junko's father) neutralizes Ed, and Largo blows up the club to facilitate everybody's escape.

Piro decides to go to the ASF, only to find Miho's room empty with signs of physical struggle.
Miho tries to go home, but finding it surrounded, turns around and goes off in a different direction.
Translation to polish
(Scanlations have now been deleted)

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iffy
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Re: Fan-made Summary - Story - chapter 10 : AFK v5.5

Post by iffy » Tue Feb 27, 2018 2:01 pm

Nothing too major except perhaps the timeline of what Piro does and a few other things.

Although what Piro finds in the room isn't so much exactly as minor as signs of a physical struggle as if there was a fight. More so he finds no Miho and a broken window., wind blowing, everything knocked over. More than a fight, more like a natural disaster. (Although who knows what he thought of the state of the room itself and its contents, a broken window and his questioning tone suggests he was just rather perplexed.)

Which kind of reflects that Miho's taunts cause Yuki to yoink both of them to the CoE, apparently through said window perhaps, one might imagine. Perhaps it was a sonic boom or vacuum that trashed the room. Struggle seems too mild. ;)

Also, Piro "deciding" (as we later find out, to go to where he knows Miho is) is after Yutaka has gotten the laptop powered on while Yuki is reading the chat logs 1235. He longingly or thoughtfully etc 1236 looks at one of the drawings Yuki marked up way back when, which is of Miho in a hospital bed and gown sort of thing, essentially in the process of cutting her hair. Piro then puts on his jacket and leaves, but at the time we don't know why or to where (although we can guess he knows where she is, in spite of what he's said, that has no confirmation). As we later find out (but is not explained or necessarily obvious at the time) the laptop had directions to where Miho is 1247 which we later find that was indeed where Piro ended up 1264 . and so on


---------
Yuki is intercepted by Kenji at the entrance of the Cave of Evil, and they argue about Miho's nature. United with Yutaka and eventually left alone in the office, Yutaka powers the swiped laptop and Yuki reads the chat logs. As this happens, Piro at the apartment leaves after looking at his Yuki-marked drawing of the Miho hair-cutting incident.

Having made some conclusions of what she thinks is happening, Yuki MG-departs the CoE to find Miho, gaps into the Analog Support Facility following the laptop directions, and locates the quite alive Miho, chillin' out, maxin' and relaxin'. While Yuki tries to talk to Miho about her and Piro's feelings, it becomes more and more a large argument. Miho taunts Yuki until Yuki yoinks them both to the Cave of Evil.

After Yuki and Miho's sudden arrival at the CoE, a number of things happen including the waiting-for-Miho group chanting mindlessly and displaying horde-ish behavior, Erika and Ibara and Boo "neutralizing" Ed, and much chaos. Erika gives a signal, Largo retrieves teh pH0n3 from Yutaka, and uses it to overload the club electronics. Power is knocked out over a large area and an escape is facilitated. Biggest Rickroll Ever.

Piro arrives at the now-empty room in the ASF, which looks like a typhoon hit its contents, as wind blows in the broken window. On the subway, Largo and Erika drop off Kimiko, and then Miho, before making plans for continued adventures. Lastly, switching to Miho, she tries to go to her now unhidden abode, but finds it surrounded by the Otaku, so turns around and leaves.

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cidjen
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Re: Fan-made Summary - Story - chapter 10 : AFK v5.5

Post by cidjen » Tue Feb 27, 2018 3:48 pm

Thanks @iffy,
I'll think about the empty room some more but the disconnection between the timeline and the resume is quite a deliberate move here.
See how it evolves from v1... Shedding details of the story on the way? In the resume I think more important is to relay what happened, in minimum details needed, not to reveal too much of it, but enough to know how it goes, describing the key moments but not revealing them fully. To try to encourage the reader to read the story, not to reveal it in great detail.
That's how I arrived at the state it's at: all the little details and the timeline is important when you read it directly. Not so when you read a resume. Here you want to achieve the sense of continuity in as few words or sentences as possible, especially if some events of the same scenes are separated by intrusion of other scenes. Hence the rearrangements. But your insights are welcome, I may improve something with them :) so thank you .
Translation to polish
(Scanlations have now been deleted)

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