Miho (Verse), Miho (Verse)

[!poem]If this is "out of practice" I'd love to see the ones where you were in practice.[/!poem]

[!poem]Hmmm - The poem I'm about to post isn't exactly on-topic, but you could read it as on-topic if you replace the girl I wrote it about with Miho...

I'm just posting this as an indication of what my poetry was like when I was on form about two years ago, and to prove that I really am out of practise, in response to smurd's post

This poem requires a little background to understand... I was once in love with someone who (it turns out) wasn't in love with me... We were an intimate pair, and I took the intimacy as a sign that my feelings were shared... They then out of the blue announced that they were leaving me, and that there was nothing between us, that they loved me but weren't in love with me, and that they 'knew' I felt the same way... They were moving out in a month...

And thus it begins:[/!poem]

How can the heart be heavy
yet feel so hollow
as to break at a whisper?

So kind the words said
as to cut like paper
drawn across thin skin

There is no question unanswered,
All is known.
A plentitude of tears fall
for no reason?

Life often lacks
In fairness and love.
But even when both abound
I cannot express either enough.

Bound, I crawl,
like an insect I scuttle.
I am worthless without expression.

Today I die,
Tommorrow I feel sure
I will die again.
My heart betrays me.

Love in my life
Scars me
Yet I yearn for it,
I have a month to live.

Three times cupid hit his mark,
Twice in youth too playfully,
Short on time and love,
Fun but empty.

Now I find myself torn
A friendship that cannot be broken
A love that will not pass
A heart that will not mend
Not over time,
Not over distance,
Not after life.
I cannot think

My anger at myself
Surpasses the rational.
But in realising this,
Nothing is solved.

My sense leaves with my love
To live away from me
"It's not because of you".
Words try to heal.

They will not.

I am apparently confused.
Not "In love", I merely "Love".
I suppose all about me is not known.

As in love
as I had ever hoped to be
I am withered and made to blossom
By her touch

But it cannot be.

Still my heart, "please beat for another"
It will lay unbeating until that day.
So broken that day will come too late.

I cry
But the fault is mine

I have tripped
Torn my heart upon itself

Pain my solace, the other pole
Oposed if you will
To what I feel about you,
Yet so alike now.

I cry
But the fault is mine.

I dance a dread game of dispair
My heart beating in your hand
So broken and gray, it shrinks.
I am not surprised you do not see

I cry
But the fault is mine.

Come to think of it, I should probably put some of my old stuff online - the publisher of the in-print poems won't mind... I didn't write the poems on commission, so I still own the copyrights

Where should I post the link when it's done though?

There's not really any any syllable count necessary on a sonnet, squee. I usually write mine in the same style as Shakespeare (iambic pentameter, I think it's called), with ten syllables per line, arranged in five couplets consisting of a soft syllable and an accented syllable. (da DA da DA da DA da DA da DA). Well, I TRY to write 'em that was anyway...

quote:

---

Originally posted by squee:
Where should I post the link when it's done though?

---

Right here!

Right...

Under construction, and a lot of work to be done, and poems to be added...

but here it is: http://helpgeeks.com/poetry

Merci beaucoups, Squee:
"a mouthful of air" takes on
Such a profound weight.

quote:

---

Originally posted by smurd:
Merci beaucoups, Squee:
"a mouthful of air" takes on
Such a profound weight.

---

"a mouthful of air"?
I do not understand this,
brain's on holiday...

/me grumbles at squee being a published poet...

/me volunteers to help archive the poetry anyway.

/me wonders: why is _Quinn talking about himself in the third person?

I was going to ask about which song people would most like to see parodied next, but after listening to the deafening silence that met 'National Rave Council', I became convinced that I lost my sense of humor recently, and that I shouldn't try anything funny until I find it again.

-_Quinn

quote:

---

Originally posted by squee:
"a mouthful of air"?
I do not understand this,
brain's on holiday...

---

An apt description
of language, given us by
Anthony Burgess.

quote:

---

Originally posted by Quinn:
...the deafening silence that met 'National Rave Council', I became convinced that I lost my sense of humor recently, and that I shouldn't try anything funny until I find it again.

---

[!poem]Actually I thought that was pretty funny and I shoulda said so, gomen. I think it's a candidate for the Madison Avenue treatment.

Just keep cranking them out... my desktop has got about a half-dozen classic pieces waiting to be mangled. Last night I was trying to find some T.S. Eliot I could adapt to a Rocky & Bullwinkle theme but it was late and nothing came of it. But, hey, it's Friday, and the Ancyent Beer-Drinkere is almost finished![/!poem]

[This may fit better under 'Rampant Speculation...']

[dagnabit, I thought I'd finally managed to get a post right on the first try!]

miho dances
and shadows shiver
but she pays them no mind

miho dances
and the ravers stare
but she ignores their awe

miho dances
with her eyes closed
but she sees more that way --

as miho dreams
so miho dances
but she is not alone

despite her isolation

miho dances

-_Quinn

[ November 06, 2001: Message edited by: Quinn ]

Oo, that was very nice. I don't use free verse much but now I see something about it I think I could use. Merci.

quote:

---

Originally posted by smurd:
... now I see something about it I think I could use.

---

So... am I about to be hoist on my own petard, or beaten at my own game? I'm interested in what it is you saw that you think you could use.

I'm glad you liked it, thanks.

-_Quinn

[ November 06, 2001: Message edited by: Quinn ]

quote:

---

Originally posted by Quinn:
So... am I about to be hoist on my own petard, or beaten at my own game?

---

I hope no-one has the impression I'm in this for one-upsmanship, except in the service of writing more verse. ;^_^ I admit I was trying to show Phaedrus what was what way back with the Euripides / Eumenides thing, and he just came up with funnier stuff in reply, and that's a good thing (to quote Martha Stewart, a.k.a. Dorianne Grey, the original Queen of Evil).

quote:

---

Originally posted by Quinn:
I'm interested in what it is you saw that you think you could use.

---

I learn things from everybody here, in outlook if not technique. In this case you had a really nice syntactical arrangement that didn't depend on rhymes -- it simply never struck me to construct a poem around that. I bet works well with serious verse (say, about Kimiko).

quote:

---

Originally posted by smurd:
I hope no-one has the impression I'm in this for one-upsmanship, except in the service of writing more verse.

---

No, not at all! I'm sorry if I gave that impression -- maybe I've been hitting the 'friendly competition' bit a little too hard, because I enjoy it so much.

-_Quinn

to my mind she is
the most beautiful thing, and
yet dark as winter.

the gale howls: bearing
leaves and rain on autumn’s squall;
black, yet pretty wind.

she gives us pain. We
must endure for her smile is
like summer’s last dawn.

but in springtime, the
pure, quickening winds bring to
us a challenger...

[OOC: Dr. Tripp: If Miho & Kimiko ever /are/ in the same strip, I'll start a 'Kimiko & Miho (Verse)' topic as soon as I see it... so keep both of your nice poem halves around.]

The '1337' manuscript translates some passages rather differently than previous efforts. For instance, Introductions 2:1 may sound rather familiar...

_The Look_

Walking like a liche lord,
hitting with a hammer,
she's an undead Queen,
never was a quitter,
likes the taste of blooddrops --
she's got the Look.

Heavenly bound,
because heaven's got her number,
when she's spinning all around
raving is a color
her dancing is a dark thing --
she's got the Look.

She's got the Look,
she's got the Look:
what in the world can make the Darkly Cute change hue,
when everything the zombies do,
they do for you?
And I go:
la la la la la -- she's got the Look.

Fire in her eyes,
naked to the T-bone
is a raver's disguise:
ribbon in her hair down,
shaking like a mad dog --
she's got the Look.

Swaying to the rave,
moving like a hammer,
she's a undead queen:
raving is her ocean,
darkness is the wet sand,
she's got the Look.

-_Quinn

[OOC -- Apparently squee remembers the 80s, because he's already added this to the 'wombicon. ]

[ November 08, 2001: Message edited by: Quinn ]

LOL OK that's going in the 'wombicon

[ November 08, 2001: Message edited by: squee ]

*ahh* That was wonderful, Quinn, I can see her in a whole new shade of darkness... Miho, eternally beautiful and dangerous to men across the centuries.

Let me know if you'd like to see more of this, or if y'all're sick of Roxette.

_Deathmatch_

"Hello, you fool, I 0wn you,
c'mon join the deathmatch."

I get hit out of nowhere,
I have to jump over a car,
be a player in this lame game,
collecting the stars.

Don't need no Necrowombicon,
I don't need no trash talk at all:

she caught a train going downtown,
she took the color from the moon:

and she'd never tell her secrets
to a wonderful ballon;
she's the heart of the darkness,
she's got me whistling "I'm just a l00n"

And it all
respawns
when it ends

and she's all
necromantic fiend.

She says:
"Hello, you fool, I 0wn you,
c'mon join the deathmatch.
Join the deathmatch!"

....

-_Quinn

[ November 08, 2001: Message edited by: Quinn ]

Hehe you don't want to get me started

Wait... cannot resist.... must..post...parody!!

It's not so much about Miho as it's about Piro and Largo, but it certainly mentions her in an interesting light

I hope no-one objects to Trac(e?)y Chapman...
The ryhme and rythym aren't perfect, but they aren't perfect in the original song either, so you should with a little imagination get the following to fit

I forget the original song's real title, but I call it 'Fast Car'... You may recognise it from the opening verse...

quote:

---

You got a fast car
I wanna ticket to anywhere
Maybee we make a deal
Maybee together we can get somewhere

---

__Haste Rune__
----

You got a haste rune
I wanna teach you to railgun
Maybee we'll make a deal
Maybee together we can frag someone

Any frags are better,
Starting from zero, got nothing to lose.
Maybee we'll score something...
Got lots of rockets, I'm in "the groove"

You got a railgun
I gotta quad to get us outta here
been working at my rocket jumps
managed to save just a little bit of health

Won't have to snipe from too far,
Just across the level and into the water
You and I can both get frags
and finally see what it means to be gibbing

My friend largo's got a problem
ya play with pineapples, that's the way it is
He says "5killz's t00 m4d f0r sh00t1ng"
His model's too l33t to gib like his.

So Miho went off and left him,
she wanted more frags than he could give,
I said "Somebody's got to take care of him"
So I quit quake and that's what I did.

You got quad damage,
will it be enough so we can RJ away?
We gotta make a decision,
Leave this fight or suicide and stay.

So remember when we were flying, flying to Japan
Fanmailed so much, felt like it was spam
Tokyo lay out before us,
and my sketchbook's tightly held under my shoulder

And I... Had a feeling I'd meet "the one",
I...
Had a feeling I could meet someone
meet someone... meet someone

You got a BFG
We go hunting, entertain ourselves.
ya still ain't got a frag,
Miho kicked your butt, and she's a girl!

I know things'll get better
You'll start fragging and I'll earn some money.
We'll try to stop our camping,
Learn to strafe-jump and sweettalk an airline.

So remember when we were flying, flying to Japan
Fanmailed so much, felt like it was spam
Tokyo lay out before us,
and my sketchbook's tightly held under my shoulder

And I... Had a feeling I'd meet "the one",
I...
Had a feeling I could meet someone
meet someone... meet someone

We got a b33r keg,
l33t b33r and bandwidth coming out our ears.
You stay out of quake for hours at a time
So all of your friends and you can swap your warez

I'd always hoped for better
Thought maybee together you and me'd get it
I ain't got no plans, ain't fraggin noone
Wanna pack my stuff and go back home.

So remember when we were flying, flying to Japan
Fanmailed so much, felt like it was spam
Tokyo lay out before us,
and my sketchbook's tightly held under my shoulder

And I... Had a feeling I'd meet "the one",
I...
Had a feeling I could meet someone
meet someone... meet someone

You got a haste rune,
Are you fast enough that you can fly away?
You gotta make a decision,
book a flight or I'll gib you my way.

[ November 08, 2001: Message edited by: squee ]

Great job, squee!

Of course, now all afternoon, I've got that guitar line going through my mind.

dah dad dah DAAAH, dah dah dahdahdah
dah dad dah DAAAH, dah dah dahdahdah

You've got a stuck brain
Can't stop thinkin' about that song
No guitar at my lab bench
Guess I'm stuck just humming along.

dah dad dah DAAAH, dah dah dahdahdah
dah dad dah DAAAH, dah dah dahdahdah

Having located a copy of the parodied song, I have to agree with Phaedrus: you done good, squee.

-_Quinn

Hehe

I'm working on Wyclef Jean's "Gone till November" at the moment

Glad you peeps enjoyed the last one

quote:

---

Originally posted by Quinn:
I was going to ask about which song people would most like to see parodied next, but after listening to the deafening silence that met 'National Rave Council', I became convinced that I lost my sense of humor recently, and that I shouldn't try anything funny until I find it again.

-_Quinn

---

Well, if you can manage something about Miho set to the Major General's Tune, I think that would qualify for the F^4 award . . .

[Note: The only really good Major General parody I've ever encountered has been the immortal Elements song by Lehrer . . .]

quote:

---

Originally posted by Togashi Gaijin:
The only really good Major General parody I've ever encountered has been the immortal Elements song by Lehrer . . .]

---

I'm not the author, and I've lost who is, but:

I've built a better model than the one at Data General
For data bases vegetable, animal, and mineral
My OS handles CPUs with multiplexed duality;
My PL/I compiler shows impressive functionality.

My storage system's better than magnetic core polarity,
You never have to bother checking out a bit for parity;
There isn't any reason to install non-static floor matting;
My disk drive has capacity for variable formatting.

I feel compelled to mention what I know to be a gloating point:
There's lots of space in memory for variable floating-point,
Which shows for input vegetable, animal and mineral
I've build a better model than the one at Data General.

The IBM new home computer's nothing more than germinal;
At Prime they still have trouble with an interactive terminal;
While Tandy's done a lousy job with operations Boolean,
At Wang the byte capacity's too small to fit a coolie in.

Intel's mid-year finances are something of the trouble sort;
The Timex-Sinclair crashes when you implement a bubble sort.
All DEC investors soon will find they haven't spent their money well;
And need I even mention Nixdorf, Univac or Honeywell?

By striving to eliminate all source code that's repetitive
I've brought my benchmark standings to results that are competitive.
In short, for input vegetable, animal and mineral
I've built a better model than the one at Data General.

In fact when I've a floppy of a minimum diameter,
When I can call a subroutine of infinite parameter,
When I can point to registers and keep their current map around,
And when I can prevent the need for mystifying wraparound,

When I can update record blocks with minimum of suffering,
And when I can afford to use 100K for buffering,
When I've performed a matrix sort and tested the addition rate,
You'll marvel at the speed of my asynchronous transmission rate.

Though all my better programs that self-reference recursively
Have only been obtained through expert spying, done subversively,
But still for input vegetable, animal, and mineral,
I've built a better model than the one at Data General.