[filk] Piro, To the tune of "Lola"

Because I can't go more than a few days without posting something here (histrionic? Perhaps), and because Dang Fool got this one stuck in my head, I give you another version of the song that has probably been done, by one wordsmith or another, about five million times. This is actually my second use of "Lola", but the first MT related one.
That said, enjoy. And Original Lyrics do follow, for those who don't remember the '70s.
I know this was filked before as "Miho", but after seeing Eiffel's sketch of Piro going nuts, I've just /got/ to do it.
----------------
Piro
Idea courtesy Dang Fool

Yuki:
I met him in a book store in Shinjuku
He was sitting reading shoujo manga by Koru Anzo
A-N-Z-O Anzo
I walked up to him and asked why he was here
He ran off, but left his bookbag, which said he was "Piro"
P-i-r-o Piro
Pi-pi-pi-pi Piro

Well I wasn't sure exactly what I should do
So I took home the bookbag and leafed on through
The work of Piro
Pi-pi-pi-pi Piro
I'm not sure how an American
Can draw manga nearly as well as a non-gaijin can
Oh, he's Piro
Pi-pi-pi-pi Piro

Seraphim:
Well I told that fool we had to chat
Did not know where his brain was at
But when I started, he promptly complained
Remind me why I took this job, again?
Well I must not be living too right
To have to put up with this whiny fool all day and all night, stupid Piro!
Pi-pi-pi-pi Piro
Pi-pi-pi-pi Piro
Pi-pi-pi-pi Piro
Pi-pi-pi-pi Piro

Piro:
I pushed her away
I ran from the store
I fell on the floor
Took out some display
And a while later with some dismay

I realized what an idiot I had been
I speak Nihongo better than English, it seems, because I'm Piro
Pi-pi-pi-pi Piro
Girls are confusing, that'll always be true
Why can't be life be more like dating sims, I ask you? Oh, I'm Piro
Pi-pi-pi-pi Piro

Largo:
Well, we haven't been very long in this place
But already Piro's been made quite a disgrace
'Cause Piro is more than a bit insane
The culture shock here must be wrecking his brain

Yuki:
Well I'm not the world's most devoted of fans
But I know that it's true, and I'm glad I'm a fan
Of poor Piro
Pi-pi-pi-pi Piro
Pi-pi-pi-pi Piro
Pi-pi-pi-pi Piro
Pi-pi-pi-pi Piro
-----------------
And because someone asked, as far as I know there is no symbolism to the name "Koru Anzo". I made it up since I couldn't find my Japanese - English dictionary. Original lyrics:
-----------------
Lola - The Kinks

I met her in a club down in old Soho
Where you drink champagne and it tastes just like cherry-cola
C-o-l-a cola
She walked up to me and she asked me to dance
I asked her her name and in a dark brown voice she said Lola
L-o-l-a lola lo-lo-lo-lo lola

Well I’m not the world’s most physical guy
But when she squeezed me tight she nearly broke my spine
Oh my Lola lo-lo-lo-lo lola
Well I’m not dumb but I can’t understand
Why she walked like a woman and talked like a man
Oh my Lola lo-lo-lo-lo lola lo-lo-lo-lo lola

Well we drank champagne and danced all night
Under electric candlelight
She picked me up and sat me on her knee
And said dear boy won’t you come home with me
Well I’m not the world’s most passionate guy
But when I looked in her eyes well I almost fell for my Lola
Lo-lo-lo-lo lola lo-lo-lo-lo lola
Lola lo-lo-lo-lo lola lo-lo-lo-lo lola

I pushed her away
I walked to the door
I fell to the floor
I got down on my knees
Then I looked at her and she at me

Well that’s the way that I want it to stay
And I always want it to be that way for my Lola
Lo-lo-lo-lo lola
Girls will be boys and boys will be girls
It’s a mixed up muddled up shook up world except for Lola
Lo-lo-lo-lo lola

Well I left home just a week before
And I’d never ever kissed a woman before
But Lola smiled and took me by the hand
And said dear boy I’m gonna make you a man

Well I’m not the world’s most masculine man
But I know what I am and I’m glad I’m a man
And so is Lola
Lo-lo-lo-lo lola lo-lo-lo-lo lola
Lola lo-lo-lo-lo lola lo-lo-lo-lo lola
----------------
Time writing filk: 20 minutes
Pushing Piro closer to insanity: priceless
-Wordsmith
"I have a clear shot!"

This post has been edited by themadwordsmith on Oct 15 2004, 07:35 PM

Don't leave the bookstore without it!

Now I'll have it stuck in my head. My backgrain must really enjoy this torture or I'd stop making suggestions I know would lead to this.

Thanks, Mad.

I thought this was really fun when Shoka did it last year, and it's still awesome!

Jammin' with the Kinks, j0.

Ah, a filk of a song I that I know, and so can comment on. Well done.

Hmm...a reference to me? I gotta filk 'em as I hear 'em!

regardless: more good work MWS, though I don't think it's as easy to match on first sight as some of your other work. (On seeing the title, I really thought "Darker Haired Gaijin" was going to be based on "Whiter Shade of Pale"!)

Riffster
ph34r the obscure ones!

Well, WSoP came out the year after the Yellow Submarine record and the year before the Yellow Submarine movie, that is 1967. This is all your fault, not mine for reading this thread just before trying to sleep. Your fault, I say!

And there are parts that just didn't need much changing, but now they've a context that makes far more sense than most interpretations of the old lyrics. BTW: I'm not the first to filk this with the adjective "Bloodless", but I wanted to keep the undead theme.

Bloodless Shade of Pale, by Dang Fool

They danced the night fandango
raved wildly out the door
I was shooting all the zombies
as the blood pour on the floor
The room was getting darker
as the flesh was blown away
When we looked out for a reload
and sunrise brought the day

And so it was that later
as the mirror told her tale
that her face, at first just ghostly,
showed a bloodless shade of pale

She said, 'He had no reason
as the truth is plain to see.
And he said things about your mother
with words won't come from me.'
Of the many preparations
Since the undead had arose
and though my eyes are now open
They might have just as well've been closed.

----
Original Lyrics:
Whiter Shade of Pale, Procol Harum

We skipped the light fandango
turned cartwheels 'cross the floor
I was feeling kinda seasick
but the crowd called out for more
The room was humming harder
as the ceiling flew away
When we called out for another drink
the waiter brought a tray

And so it was that later
as the miller told his tale
that her face, at first just ghostly,
turned a whiter shade of pale

She said, 'There is no reason
and the truth is plain to see.'
But I wandered through my playing cards
and would not let her be
one of sixteen vestal virgins
who were leaving for the coast
and although my eyes were open
they might have just as well've been closed

No, it was not, being meant generally. I've seen two of your filks and I'm familar with the orginal sources for both. There are other filks to which my comment applies.

Dang Fool: While Bloodless Shade of Pale works, part of filking is getting away from the orginal lyrics while retaining the same rhythm and rhyme scheme as the original song. Perhaps you might want to tinker with it some more and make the filk entirely yours, instead of incorporating elements of the source lyrics. (Thought I admit finding something that can replace "fandango" and that still scans will be a challenge.)

Oh 'fandango' isn't the challenge because it doesn't require a rhyme. 'Fantastic' is an adequate substitute. The final line needs replacing, too. The eyes open/closed doesn't add anything.

But the whole middle segment lines (miller, ghostly face) were so meaningless originally. And I like how "that her face, at first just ghostly" does mean something in mine. I do change parts, but do you feel I should change every single line?

Yeah, "Bloodless Shade of Pale" needs some work. And to bug you more, Dang Fool, you missed the last two verses! Though I'll spare you the agony, as they really only appear in live versions. The missing lyrics, for the curious, are...

She said, 'i'm home on shore leave,'
Though in truth we were at sea
So i took her by the looking glass
And forced her to agree
Saying, 'you must be the mermaid
Who took neptune for a ride.'
But she smiled at me so sadly
That my anger straightway died

If music be the food of love
Then laughter is its queen
And likewise if behind is in front
Then dirt in truth is clean
My mouth by then like cardboard
Seemed to slip straight through my head
So we crash-dived straightway quickly
And attacked the ocean bed

Yeah, I listen to too much music. So?
-Wordsmith

Yes. One of the problems of filking something that is too well suited for the subject is dropping those very lyrics which made you decide that this would be a good song to filk, but that is part of filking. Taking the original tune and lyrics, and making something new from it that retains a tangible link with the source material.

However, if you like, you can leave this filk unchanged and can take satisfaction in making the orginal lines mean something. Just call it a learning experience and move on. The next time you filk, you can filk that song in its entirety.

New and Improved, with 17.5% more new lyrics!
*batteries not included, member FDIC, some settling may occur in shipment.

Bloodless Shade of Pale, by Dang Fool

They danced the night fantastic.
Raved wildly out the door.
I was shooting all the zombies
As the blood pour'd on the floor.
The room was getting darker
As the flesh was blown away.
When I looked up for a reload
The sunrise brought the day.

I wondered as I wandered
If the mirror shows her hale.
I more than half have doubted
I'd see her bloodless shade of pale

She said, 'His drugs have faded.
He fears for all our safety.
And he said things 'bout your mother
with words not to come from me.'
Of the many preparations
for the undead that I seek,
I've papers now in order
And can counter them all next week.

----
Original Lyrics:
Whiter Shade of Pale, Procol Harum

We skipped the light fandango
turned cartwheels 'cross the floor
I was feeling kinda seasick
but the crowd called out for more
The room was humming harder
as the ceiling flew away
When we called out for another drink
the waiter brought a tray

And so it was that later
as the miller told his tale
that her face, at first just ghostly,
turned a whiter shade of pale

She said, 'There is no reason
and the truth is plain to see.'
But I wandered through my playing cards
and would not let her be
one of sixteen vestal virgins
who were leaving for the coast
and although my eyes were open
they might have just as well've been closed

I've seen the verses on websites, but I've never heard them. Have you? I doubt many others here have. No. This is sufficient: Cave of Evil; possible vampiricism; police mistranslations; And scheduled rampages. Isn't that enough for one song?

Ray won't mind the loan. The original Lola used Coca-Cola and that's how the Kinks sang it for years ...

- Sparky

That's better. Added to the CWDB.

This post has been edited by AncestralHamster on Oct 20 2004, 09:32 AM