Megatokyo Story Discussions Christmas Filking Thread, Megatokyo Story Discussions Christmas Filking Thread

[Quinn]

Dang... that's so much better than what I was going to do with "Sweet Brightly Cute." :-)

- _Quinn

[Karma_B]

Here's one that hit me unexpectedly - I got the first half-line, and the rest followed on naturally, though I hadn't intended the left-turn into bittersweet sentiment.

The proper visual setting for this filk is this strip.

Kawaii in a Manger

Kawaii in a manger, No couch for a bed
The beautiful Ping-chan lay down her sweet head
Surrounded by cardboard with signs of warning
The little EDS lay down recharging

The l33t d00d is modding, the artist awakes
But troubled young Ping-chan no sound does she make
She loves her friend Piro in her secret heart
But knows it's her duty to play out her part

He is her end-user, she's programmed to stay
And watch him in silence as he gives away
His heart to the kind Kimiko's tender care
O grant her the courage her burden to bear

Original lyrics:

Away in a Manger

Away in a manger, no crib for a bed
The little Lord Jesus lay down his sweet head
The stars in the bright sky looked down where He lay
The little Lord Jesus asleep on the hay

The cattle are lowing, the poor baby wakes
But little Lord Jesus no crying he makes
I love the Lord Jesus, look down from the sky
And stay by my cradle 'till morning is nigh

Be near me Lord Jesus, I ask thee to stay
Close by me forever, and love me I pray
Bless all the dear Children in thy tender care
And fit us for heaven to live with thee there

EDIT: Oops, wrong strip - corrected now.

[Shimizu-san]

EE! Karma, i love it!!

[Kinkou]

Ok. I admit these are spur of the moment and forced, so I beg forgiveness from the Powers that Be.
***
Christmas in Megatokyo
done to : Christmas in Killarney
A cute pre-teen or BG mean...
The scariest thing you've ever seen
Is Christmas in Megatokyo
With all the RAVERS there.

It's nice, you know, to shoot your beau
While rampaging Megatokyo.
And Shoka-san you know, of course
Will hatch an evil scheme.

Shadowdancer's life
Is ruled by complex heart
Fo rif her love should fail
She'd blow the town apart.

How lovely it feels to shurk the sun
And join the fun of destruction.
Bathed in a sinister glow
Almost too much to bear
Is Christmas in Megatokyo
With all the dolfies there.
******
2) I Saw Miho kissing Piro-san
done to: I SAw Mommy kissing Santa Claus by T. Conner (c.) .1952

I saw Mio kissing Piro-san
Inside the gaming universe last night.
They didn't see me creep
Past the firewalls so L33T,
But I found the view stunk
So closer I crept to take a peek.
Then, I saw Miho pushing Piro-san
Underneath his chin, blushing bright.
Oh what a laugh it would have been
If Largo had only seen
Miho kissing Piro-san last night.
***
3) Sleep Well, my Children
done to: Sleep Well, Little Children by A. Bergman, L. Klatzkin © 1956

Sleep well, my children,
Whatever you are;
Tomorow is rampage
Shadowdancer Duskstar.
Soon the faithless will fall
And tomorrow you'll see
Every person, one and all
Waiting just for me.

Sleep well, my children,
And don't dance through the night; Tomorrow is rampage
All merry and bright.
Soon you'll hear the voices sing,
Time for dreams to come true
As the store wakes to bring
Miho Blankets for you.
***

Sorry again for the butchering. ^__^"

[cutelildrow]

AHAHAHAHHAHAHA!

TC! Pure TC! XD

Kinkou-chan, that was fantastic, and the typos were forgivable. I hereby appoint you Church Muse of Humor. Please PM Integral for the change in your non-RP rank.

[Integral]

In reply to:

---

Please PM Integral for the change in your non-RP rank.

---

No need, already done. However, Kinkou was under the list of RP-ers, so I didn't change that. Would've been too hard to try and move it to the non-RP list since I don't know exactly when Kinkou joined, and everyone's in order of join date.

We now return you to your Christmas filks~

[Shoka]

A shadowy group appears in the darkened street below Piro's and Largo's balcony at the Megagamer's store. There seem to be six figures in the group, or perhaps seven. As they begin to sing, a light goes on within the apartment, and a pair of familiar shapes are silhouetted at the window.

Here We Come A-Rampaging
( to the tune of Here We Come A-Wassailing)

Here we come a-rampaging
Along the Tokyo streets,
Here we come a rioting
To make your day complete!
Sticks and stones strike at you,
And may you go rampage too,
But we'll hail you, and send you
A ticket to our rave,
And we'll send you a ticket to our rave!

We're the minions of the girl
You call the Evil Queen,
We're the raver zombie hordes,
And we're dee-come-pose-ing!
Sticks and stones strike at you,
And may you go rampage too,
But we'll hail you, and send you
A ticket to our rave,
And we'll send you a ticket to our rave!

Good Largo come and dance with us
For just a little while,
Put aside your crossbow and
Give us a little smile!
Sticks and stones strike at you,
And may you go rampage too,
But we'll hail you, and send you
A ticket to our rave,
And we'll send you a ticket to our rave!

We are victims of a curse
That Miho put upon
Us ravers when you found for her
The Necrowombicon!
Sticks and stones strike at you,
And may you go rampage too,
But we'll hail you, and send you
A ticket to our rave,
And we'll send you a ticket to our rave!

Could you and Piro let us in?
For we would like to dine,
Some human brains and bone marrow
Would suit us all just fine!
Sticks and stones strike at you,
And may you go rampage too,
But we'll hail you, and send you
A ticket to our rave,
And we'll send you a ticket to our rave!

Oh that's too bad, you don't feel well,
We hope you're better soon,
So you can come and dance with us
Beneath the winter moon!
Sticks and stones strike at you,
And may you go rampage too,
But we'll hail you, and send you
A ticket to our rave,
And we'll send you a ticket to our rave!

Shouting and the sound of heavy furniture being shifted in front of the door can be heard coming from the apartment. The carolers move off, their giggling voices sounding suspiciously familiar.

[Kinkou]

*applause*

That was VERY well done! hehehe.

I bow to you Master Shoka and am at your service.

[Kinkou]

Ok. Here's another one that just WOULD not leave me alone. Sorry for the butchering.

Christmas in the UFl
done to Christmas in the trenches by John McCutcheon
*******

My name is Doctor LIghtsider, I come from the UFL
And many years have passed to make a rather strange tale.
From Miho to Erika, From Ping to here
I heal for people and friends that I love most dear.
Twas Christmas in the UFL, where the pies so bitter hung.
The manic halls of the hospital were still; no curses sung.
Our compatriots in the CoM were dancing the night away
Their brave and glorious tasks complete for the day.

I was sitting with my heart, Tohru, on the battered couch
When across the rooms came Mahou with her medical pouch.
Says I, "Hello Mahou, my friend." And each Rei strained to hear
As she spoke up as she drew ever near.
"I've come to ask some question." She says straight to me.
Soon, one by one, each question's answer was given safely.

The patients rested silently; the moans of pain no more
As Christmas brought us respite from the fanboy war.
As soon as we finished, a reverent pause was spent.
"If I may, I have a rather personal question." I looked to see just what she meant.
"What is the reason you are so upset?" "Tis the night only," says I
And glanced silent at the star filled sky.
'There's someone coming.' I think and my time bide
As the form winged, lone cross the eve. I sighed.
Her feathers gleamed beautifully, like Christmas stars in the moonlit night.
She bravely flew, heart unarmored, into the waiting light.

Soon, one by one on either side, walked into No Man's Land
With neither glare nor sharpened tongue, we met hand-to-hand.
We shared our shattered thoughts and wishes to no more dwell.
And in a flair of magic light, we held each other still.
We traded words and caresses that shook us to our bone.
No idea did we have, either one, on our own.
The night continued to show just what might have been
To this curious and unlikely silent man.

Soon daylight stole upon us and we were Lightsider and Shadowdancer once more
With sad farewells; we each prepared to settle back to war.
But the question haunting both hearts that lived that wonderous night,
'Whose love shall I set within my lonely sights?'
Twas Christmas in the UFL where pies, so bitter hung.
The manic halls of the hospital warmed and shone like the sun.
For the walls we'd kept between us to exact the work of war
Had crumbled and were gone forever more.

My name is Doctor Lightsider, in the UFL I dwell.
Each hour after that lovely breath, I learned my lesson well.
That those who do not venture and attempt not a thing
Will not reach peace of soul and mind the like so far unseen.

[snark]

I've never done one of these before, but it looks like fun...

----------------------

The Night Before Update
(with apologies to whoever's running out of them - especially Dom)

'Twas the night before update,
And all through the forum
Discussion continued
With a sense of decorum

When suddenly what to my eyes did appear
But a SGD comic, and how it did sear
I hurriedly warned all the others around
That the main page was now severely unsound

But to my surprise, my shock and dismay
A great many forumites shouted "hooray"
They raved on Dom's brilliance, his wit, his panache
While others thought it should go out with the trash

Lively debate from then did ensue
Whose side who was on, well nobody knew
Reason and nonsense were thrown into the fray
Because everyone passing had soon had their say

But soon it diminishes, and quiet resumes
We mope about, no longer an argument looms
Soon from the forums comes many a shout:
"Hey, when is the next one coming out?!"

[Karma_B]

ROFL. Very nice, Snark.

[Kinkou]

Very nice filk. And too true to the characters of the furum.

^___^ congrats!

[smurd]

Yeah yeah yeah, I know it's not a Christmas song, but somehow it's become associated with Christmas. (As I pondered suitable filk-fodder for this thread, this is what I was hearing on PA sytems everywhere.)

Japanese pronounciation of "Tokyo" o-negai: sounds like two syllables, not three. (I think the short/long vowel distinction of Nihongo is lost on a lot of ears, at least when used in English.) I changed the last two lines because there aren't that many words rhyming with "thing." Betcha that's why the original is so short. HAH!

A lot of the rhymes are rather strained, so please feel free to extend this. Actually, when you consider the ensemble permutations, the possibilities are endless!

Here in MegaTokyo to the tune of "My Favorite Things" from The Sound of Music

Piro: Seifuku'd schoolgirls with socks that are floppy,
New shoujo manga with plots that are soppy,
Sad-eyed young girls stranded out in the snow,
That's why I came here to MegaTokyo!

Largo: Decaying empires straight out of Gibbon,
Decaying zombies that I cut to ribbons,
Rail guns with bullets that endlessly flow,
All that's online here in MegaTokyo!

Kimiko: Living a life that's not stranded in limbo,
Playing a gig and not playing a bimbo,
Getting to talk to this fellow Piro,
That's what I want out of MegaTokyo!

Piro: Now I'm dressed up!
Largo: I'm not messed up!
Kimiko: And I'm out of dough!
All: But then we remember just what we came for,
And then we don't feel so low!

Yuki: Cute gaijin guys who are also romantics,
Ping: Cute gaijin guys who don't play with semantics,
Erika: Cute gaijin losers with nowhere to go,
All: That's what we've found here in MegaTokyo!

Inspector Sonoda: Rampaging zombies who have the right permit!
Ed: Dead things! Largo: And cool things! Ping: And turtles in orbit!
Miho: Legions of ravers who dance deep below,
All: That's what we love about MegaTokyo!

Piro: When I've fscked up,
Largo: When my time's up,
Kotone: When I'm stuck in snow,
All: We simply remember just why we came here,
And then we don't feel so low!

Erika: Fanboys who know how to watch from a distance,
Miho: Fanboys who jump at my smallest insistence,
Kimiko: Fanboys who hide from my coffeepot's blow,
All: They must be somewhere in MegaTokyo!

Seraphim: Respectful clients who know I'm not kidding,
Asmodeus: Furry familiars who do all my bidding,
Boo: ---
All: That's what's at stake here in MegaTokyo!

Dom: An Aitch-and-Kay pistol that gleams when I shine 'er,
Ed: Holsters in colors that match my eye-liner,
Junpei: Worthy opponents for Junpei to throw,
All: That's why we're working in MegaTokyo!

Asmodeus: When my cat nips,
Ed: When my face hurts,
Dom: When there's no ammo,
All: We simply remember the job that's at hand,
And then we don't feel so low!

(Apologies to Rodgers and Hammerstein)

My Favorite Things from "The Sound of Music"

Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens
Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens
Brown paper packages tied up with strings
These are a few of my favorite things

Cream colored ponies and crisp apple streudels
Doorbells and sleigh bells and schnitzel with noodles
Wild geese that fly with the moon on their wings
These are a few of my favorite things

Girls in white dresses with blue satin sashes
Snowflakes that stay on my nose and eyelashes
Silver white winters that melt into springs
These are a few of my favorite things

When the dog bites
When the bee stings
When I'm feeling sad
I simply remember my favorite things
And then I don't feel so bad

[Shoka]

Oh man, what a streak! First Kinkou, then snark, and now a classic from smurd. If this get's much better, I don't know if I'll be able to stand it!
.
.
.
.
But I'll try.

[Caduceuskun]

XD XD XD

These have been great, folks! I'm glad I managed to get this started. Keep it up! Feel free to post more than one!

[lucifereacention]

I can't believe the good stuff on this thread, either, Shoka. and you're up there with my favorites. you, Smurd, and all these wonderful christmas filks. makes me want to sing!

The twelve days in Megatokyo

HUH? I'm gonna filk? uh oh.... un... *thinks* well here I go, appologies for adding my poor filk to your greats. wait a second... what was the title again? Twelve days, I can do, but I'm just going to write the last verse, as you can all see where it goes from begining to end

The twelve days in Megatokyo

On the Twlefth day of christmas, the forums gave to me

12 Tourists trolling
11 ||3//|3|35 |_337|||9
10 Factions fighting
9 Filkers flowing
8 Cons of plotting
7 Mike Arts bleaching
6 Godmods fighting
5 Golden Pings!
4 forums Dommed
3 Drinking links
2 new rants
and a walpaper starring Piro

I think I broke a few unspoken rules of crap-filking there, but in good fun I assure you. I'm surprised this song hasn't shown before.

[believe2000]

Oh Seraphim

Oh Seraphim, Oh Seraphim,
How your wings they taunt me.
Oh seraphim, Oh Seraphim,
They make me think so naughty

With the trenchcoat that you wear,
And the way you make boo stare.
Oh Seraphim, Oh Seraphim,
Acessorize the party.

Oh Seraphim, oh Seraphim,
You're always acting angelic.
Oh Seraphim, Oh Seraphim,
Even when he acts the pr***.

The way you looked at boo that day,
He made the kitty run away.
Oh Seraphim, Oh Seraphim,
You're never are sadistick.

*Keep our artist sane there, you've got your work cut out for you, especially with us people here.

Merry Holidays: and Many Happy Days To Come

[Kinkou]

*Bows to esteemed leader* Milord BG and Lady Yukiko, I humbly ask for forgiveness and am sorry for what I'm about to do. It was either you or Manta...and frankly you lost the coin toss. "
****

Yukiko's BG Baby done to:
Santa Baby written by J.Javits and P.Springer originally sung by Ertha Kitt

BG baby, slip Sabyr's head in here, for me
He's been an awfully bad boy.
BG baby, and hurry to the Church tonight.

BG baby, an out-of-print Megatokyo too, well poo.
I'll wait up for you dear.
BG baby, and hurry to the Church tonight.

Think of all the fun I've had to miss
Think of all the people I haven't pissed.
Tomorrow I could be oh so good
If you'd check off my hon-do list,
Beautifully do.

BG honey, takeout a ph34rbot and really that's
Not a lot.
I've been an angel all day.
BG baby, and hurry to the Church tonight.

BG cutie, there's one thing I really do need, to feed
Not-penguin a pie.
BG cutie, and hurry to the Church tonight.

BG baby, I'm filling my in box with stacks of contracts
Sign your 'X' on the line.
BG baby, and hurry to the Church tonight.

Come and trim my Christmas tree
With decorations coutesy of DewPrey.
I really do belong with you
Let's see if you belong with me.
Who thinks so too?

BG baby, forgot to mention one thing, a ring
I don't mean phone.
BG baby, and hurry to the Church tonight.

Hurry to the Church tonight.
****

{For those who don't know DewPrey is pronounced Du-Pre. If you don't know what it is..pm me and I'll tell you.}

[smurd]

The first version of this I ever heard, as a kid listening to the radio back when dinosaurs ruled the earth, featured obnoxious sound effects, i.e., kissing noises after the middle verses. Substitute your standard meat-hitting-meat and oof-'n'-grunt SFX for this version.

I Saw Dom Assaulting Santa Claus to the tune of "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus"

I saw Dom assaulting Santa Claus
After Santa's sleigh broke down last night;
Yes, he grabbed him by the beard,
And "Hand it over, Claus," he sneered,
He pistol-whipped Saint Nick and grabbed his sack and disappeared!

So why did Dom assault poor Santa Claus
And leave the guy in such a dreadful state?
'Cos he brought Dom sticks and coal,*
And the kid just lost control, so don't f--- with Dom, so full of hate!

(Apologies to... to whomever wrote this; I can't seem find an attributed version)

I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus

I saw Mommy kissing Santa Claus
Underneath the mistletoe last night;
She didn't see me creep
Down the stairs to have a peep;
She thought that I was tucked up in my bedroom fast asleep!

Then I saw Mommy tickle Santa Claus
Underneath his beard so snowy white;
Oh what a laugh it would have been
If Daddy had only seen Mommy kissing Santa Claus last night!
---
* I'm sure our European friends recognize the old custom of Kris Kringl, Père Noël, etc. putting sticks and coal in the stockings of baaad little boys and girls.

[smurd]

Not to put down Hallmark, but if you peruse the editors' guidelines throughout the many publications listed in Poet's Market, you see the phrase "No Hallmark-style verse" over and over...

As for the piece being filked here, I don't think anyone can top Pete Abrams' version, "Sluggy Mummy Christmas."

It's a Cold, Dark, Hallmark Christmas to the tune of "Have a Holly Jolly Christmas"

It's a cold, dark, Hallmark Christmas,
It's the poets' worst nightmare;
Yes, they live in fear of what they'll hear
In this season of despair.

It's a cold, dark, Hallmark Christmas,
Everywhere you'll read bad verse;
So be on your guard for greeting cards
Where it goes from bad to worse.

Oh, the inanity,
This cheerful abuse;
Oh, the humanity!,
Well, at least there's booze...

It's a cold, dark, Hallmark Christmas,
So buck up, and face your fear:
Yes, I'm thinkin' I'll be drinkin' 'til I'm stinkin' for Christmas this year!

(Apologies to Johnny Marks; dedicated to Phaedrus, who bested me in an old haiku tit-for-tat with this gem)

Have a Holly Jolly Christmas

Have a holly, jolly Christmas,
It's the best time of the year;
I don't know if there'll be snow,
But have a cup of cheer.

Have a holly, jolly Christmas,
And when you walk down the street,
Say "Hello" to friends you know
And everyone you meet.

Oh, ho, the mistletoe
Hung where you can see;
Somebody waits for you;
Kiss her once for me!

Have a holly jolly Christmas,
And in case you didn't hear:
Oh by golly have a holly jolly Christmas this year!

[Caduceuskun]

o.o

This stuff rocks, Smurd-san.

I wish my brain would start working so I could contribute a little to my own thread. ^^;;

[smurd]

Most of what I put up I wind up disliking the morning after, but I thought "I Saw Dom Assaulting Santa Claus" came together kinda nicely...