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Megatokyo Forums > Story Discussions > Haiku : [282] N3kt4r of the Godz

Posted by: DeosArcana Jul 8 2002, 05:22 AM
Finding Heaven in a glass
Did you even taste?

Posted by: vonSudden Jul 8 2002, 06:52 AM
Why bother with taste?
The future is closing in
Prepare for zombies!

Posted by: smurd Jul 8 2002, 10:44 AM
In Heaven, they say,
There is no beer. They are wrong --
Drink deep, grasshopper.

Posted by: Shoka Jul 8 2002, 10:44 AM
Five floors above Tokyo's streets,
Is an ale-house where friends often meet;
Where the mugs do their work
At four "glugs" and a "glurk",
For four hundred yen - that is sw33t!

Posted by: smurd Jul 8 2002, 11:55 AM
Any poet worth his or her salt
Can muster the words to exalt
The magic elixir
That comes from the mixture
Of water, hops, yeast, and steeped malt.

Posted by: Shoka Jul 8 2002, 01:48 PM
an island of light,
beer and laughter, warm and bright,
afloat in the night

Ah smurd, as you quaff your libations,
And compose your fine beer exhortations,
I perceive what you knew:
That this magical brew
Is the basis of civilization!

Posted by: smurd Jul 8 2002, 06:28 PM
Bathed in a unique sensation,
My mind is alight with elation
As I swim without fear
In the free-flowing beer
Of the Sea of Illumination.

Posted by: Goushiken Jul 8 2002, 07:29 PM
Above busy streets
its consumed in mere moments
sweet n3kt4r from G0dz

Posted by: Cryshalo Jul 9 2002, 08:14 AM
After toiling in the
sun; dealing with the zombies;
Hey! Sapporo time!

After a long hard day, nothing else satisfies Largo like ... l33t b33r, the l33test b33r in the world.

Posted by: Shoka Jul 9 2002, 11:33 AM
As his drinking companions may witness,
When Largo drinks beer, he means business;
But for all of the ch33r
In this Japanese b33r,
Let's face it - this simply ain't Guinness!

Posted by: smurd Jul 9 2002, 01:04 PM
To find out which beer type surpasses,
Jut hold up your mugs and your glasses:
The taste that's sensational
Is inversely relational
To th'amount of light that it passes.

[!verse]Yeah, it's not so good. But I want to keep this beer-verse going.[/!verse]

Posted by: smurd Jul 9 2002, 01:04 PM
To find out which beer type surpasses,
Just hold up your mugs and your glasses:
The taste that's sensational
Is inversely relational
To th'amount of light that it passes.

[!verse]Yeah, it's not so good. But I want to keep this beer-verse going.[/!verse]

Posted by: Shoka Jul 9 2002, 01:44 PM
dear and holy lord
of all the little penguins,
damn, can largo drink!

Crys, I don't know if that's a common expression down under or not,
but when I saw your post over in the "n3ckt4r of the godz" thread, I
nearly fell off of my chair. Then I counted the syllables, and noticed
you were only one short of a haiku, so I stuck one in, and brought it
over here. Hope ye don't mind!

Posted by: Shoka Jul 9 2002, 05:48 PM
They say drinking American brew
Is like love made inside a canoe,
It is fsking too close
To water, and most
Of the pleasure is lost to the crew.

[unverse]A play on something I once heard John Cleese say (but Cleese didn't say "fsking").[/unverse]

Posted by: vonSudden Jul 10 2002, 03:39 AM
"If the beer is too light, it will stink"
You say and pour the beer in the sink
If you suddenly shout
"This ain't no stout"
I'll reply, "Oh, shut up and drink!"

Posted by: DeosArcana Jul 10 2002, 06:04 AM
Erika watches
While Largo shows off his skills
As a drinking king

Is the silence between them
Those two crazy kids

Posted by: Shoka Jul 10 2002, 10:22 AM
Each man has his own course to steer
Among beverages, both far and near,
So if you prefer
To drink water, dear sir,
Very well - but then why call it beer?

Posted by: vonSudden Jul 10 2002, 03:10 PM
A stout dark, well-drawn, worth it's boon
With a foam-crown that will make you swoon
Enjoyed without haste
With a bitter-sweet taste
But sir, can you give me a spoon?

In drinking, there may be more than one end
You might need something quicker, my friend
There are zombies all over
It's not good to be sober
So tilt your head back and your elbow bend

Posted by: Shoka Jul 10 2002, 10:08 PM
The Guinness Fanboy
(A parody of Kipling's "")

I've tasted many a beer along my trails,
An' some of 'em was good an' some was not:
The lagers and the bitters and the ales,
But Guinness Stout's the finest o' the lot!
I never 'ad a ha'pint worth o' bok
That equalled 'alf a swallow o' the stout,
An' I never 'ope to get past six o'clock
Wi'out the taste o' Guinness in my mouth.
So let's 'oist a pint o' Guinness to the land from which it comes,
(That's the famous "Im-reld Oil", as it 'as been known to some),
For ye'll never find more flavor in the beers that you 'ave found,
An' ye'll 'ave me for your comrade while you're buying all the rounds!

The 'ead on Guinness leaves a ring o' foam
Upon your glass when you 'ave 'ad a tug,
An' the konny-soor can tell where you are from
By countin' up the rings left on your mug:
The Oirish leave not more than five or six,
The Limeys just two more, 'an that's a puzzle,
An' Yanks leave seventeen because they sip,
An' Aussies don't leave none because they guzzle!
So let's 'oist a pint o' Guinness and then drink each other's cheer,
For there's no misfortune greater than to be too ill for beer;
An' if we go too long wi'out, we'll surely die o' thirst,
Or substitute with water an' then surely die accurst'.

Now German dopplebok is very fine,
When autumn brings Oktoberfest about,
An' English bitters always beat French wine,
While Trappist ale 'as strength wi'out a doubt.
But Irish beer will always 'old the title,
An' if you doubt me you can take a look
Within the pages o' that bar-fly's bible,
The one an' only Guinness Record Book!
So let's 'oist a pint o' Guinness an' right down our throats we'll pour,
When we reach the bottom of our mugs we'll order us s'more;
For there'll never be a better way to pass our days and nights:
'Ere's an 'ealth to all this company, an' all your years be bright.

[unverse]Well, I'm not really this extreme about Guinness, but for some reason I've been getting into this. I blame it on smurd, actually - it's all his fault![/unverse]

Posted by: JRandomLurker Jul 10 2002, 11:37 PM
[!haiku] oh crap, I've got to follow THAT sw33t verse? ^^;;;;;; Well, here's my "little effort" (take that as "small poem" or "laziness", as you like) anyway: [/!haiku]

Largo on 'zilla
sees a sea of lights ahead
"STOP! That building stays!"

Posted by: vonSudden Jul 11 2002, 01:41 AM
It's said Bud's a drink for the male
And a good stout will not become stale
With moonshine or scotch
You can't really botch
But me, I prefer Caffrey's Ale

Posted by: smurd Jul 11 2002, 06:46 AM
Obviously I do not spend as much time on the forum as I should. More parody is an absolute good!

I doff my hat, sir, for this excellent parody!!

Posted by: Cryshalo Jul 11 2002, 10:39 PM
Come on, whistle boys!
Sing a song again! Recount events
long past, over cold beer!

no shoka, the penguins comment isn't something common down here (although strictly speaking, from where I stand, all you are down under me......) it's just I have a penchant for making outlandish and esotric oaths and such. Penguins are just what came to mind. Thanks for fixing it up, I knew there was something wrong with the syllable count but I was pressed for time...

And yes smurd, you should be in here more often. Do what I do, follow Shoka's posting. Shoka's the local literature l33t and a perfectly poetic parodiser (parodiser? where-tf did that come from...?)

Posted by: Shoka Jul 12 2002, 02:00 AM
Oi! Thanks for the great compliment Crys - I let it stand for a bit, the better to enjoy the sensation of a swelling head, but I have to allow that it ain't so.

I've only been posting since April, and have only done one parody (or two, if you count that Hamlet stuff), and there have been a lot of really talented poets and prosodists posting great stuff in this forum for a lot longer than I have. I won't mention their names, 'cause I don't want to embarrass smurd and quinn and rowan and mintaka and jrandomlurker and deosarcana and . . . oops . . .

Posted by: Cryshalo Jul 13 2002, 03:46 AM

I know, there are a lot of our happy poets around, but you were the one being mentioned. Besides, you seem to be the one who knows more shakespearean obscurity then all the rest of us combined. Or rather, you use said knowledge more.

And for the rest, I hope everyone starts giving us more haiku/limericks, and then for more new faces. Make the haiku threads the most active thread on the forum.

mmm, Mintaka... made Song for Miho *giggle* I liked that one... must convince to do more...

Posted by: Lothe Jul 13 2002, 06:25 PM

There's a bar in the Japanese nation
Whose name got quite lost in translation:
To say it just right
It should be "Sea of Light"
But instead it was "illumination".

[note] I finally managed to write a decent limerick wink.gif This poem is based on the fact that I'm used to translating "Hikari" as "light" and not "illumination", but that's a perfectly legimate rendering, and if Piro wants to write it that way, well, I'm not making fun of his translation or anything happy.gif [/note]

Posted by: ((Tomassan)) Jul 14 2002, 09:59 AM
<<From the perspective of Largo>>

O Beer, you ail my
Pains. Without you I am just
Nothing. Hollow. Dead

This place has big mugs
Sw33t! I can get used to this!
N3kt4r 0f the Godz!

not bad for a n00b?
I, too do the poem thing. I
feel I've found my home

(*sniff, sniff*)

Posted by: JRandomLurker Jul 14 2002, 04:46 PM
konnichiwa, sir,
and welcome to the party.
more verse is a Win

do the poem thing, eh?
I browsed your website but could
not find examples...

you DO have some 1337
arts, though, on that page of yours.
soft, kawaii


Posted by: Shoka Jul 15 2002, 02:18 AM
Nice haiku, and I concur with JRL about your art; however:

Your drawings are sw33t, but you know,
Your sad girls don't have any snow!
So off to the l33t
High mountain retreat
Of is where you must go!

seriously though,
that is quite marvelous work -
so hang in there, tom!

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