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Megatokyo Forums > Story Discussions > Haiku [188?] Kimiko's sadness


Posted by: Rowan Bristol Nov 3 2001, 12:59 AM
-Kimiko

Dreams fading away
fanboys as bad as they seem
pervert foreigner

-Erika

Typical bad day
Made worse by stupid roommate
Eat your soba now!


Posted by: glump Nov 3 2001, 01:35 AM
I paused in the street
Stood there just a moment's time
Suddenly, I'm tired

Disillusionment;
What kind of world is this, 'neath
The veil of my dreams?

What ugliness have
I uncovered, that lives in
Kindness and shy smiles?

And why, after all
Do I still feel his eyes on
Me, unassuming?

The world in a stark
Relief of grey, I make my
Way home through the streets

And wonder what it
Is about the universe
That hope is punished

-----

[glump]I do like this, but I'm not satisfied; it's too simplistic. I don't think I captured her right. I'll try again later.[/glump]

[ November 03, 2001: Message edited by: Garran ]


Posted by: Quinn Nov 3 2001, 01:47 AM
Generous stranger,
does she love you very much?
Must she be so young?

The hunger that leads
to my depression stems not
from poor nutrition,

so it hurts to ask:
"Erika, is Piro-san
that kind of gaijin?"

-_Quinn

[ November 03, 2001: Message edited by: Quinn ]


Posted by: Khym Chanur Nov 3 2001, 03:10 AM
[!haiku]
Gah! I'm so dense! It did occur to me that Kimiko started looking down because she finally realized that the nice seeming Piro might be a pervert until I read these haikus.

Hmmm. I think this lends some weight to the theories that Kimko's shock at seeing Ping was at least partial due to disappointment; if it was just because of embarassment, the "Is he a pervert or what?" thought would have occurred to her a lot sooner.
[/!hauku]


Posted by: Phaedrus Nov 3 2001, 05:34 AM
Frost-wilted flower,
petals dropping one by one.
Her smile is fading.

[edit: better closing line]

[ November 03, 2001: Message edited by: Phaedrus ]


Posted by: Phaedrus Nov 3 2001, 09:05 AM
Found Haiku

What kind of guy is
this Piro-san you work with?
Quiet. Otaku.


Posted by: Phaedrus Nov 3 2001, 09:15 AM
Could my card-giver
prove so base and honorless?
No. Eat some ramen.

Posted by: smurd Nov 3 2001, 09:35 AM
Little hopes rise up,
and then pop like soap bubbles...
I'm just not hungry.

Posted by: HitScan Nov 3 2001, 01:22 PM
[tanka]
Doubt now rules the day,
Uncertainty now abounds,
Trust this strange one now?
Dejection now shows its face,
On poor Kimiko's visage.
[/tanka]

I too know her pain,
But with my confusion gone,
Ignorance is bliss.


[!haiku] First Tanka of the thread? I'm even late! [/!haiku]


Posted by: Kojiro Takenashi Nov 3 2001, 01:55 PM
Kimiko wonders
Erika arrives with food
Commands Kimiko

Posted by: O.P. Nov 3 2001, 06:43 PM
Sleeping with schoolgirl?
He who gave me the rail card?
A hunger daydream!

Posted by: Kojiro Takenashi Nov 3 2001, 08:08 PM
Foolish young Idol
You must be rather confused
Eat this now, or else

Posted by: smurd Nov 4 2001, 09:48 AM
[tanka]

The pretty smile fades…
Thinks, this Gaijin lives in sin!
Bare legs and long braids,
Ecchi?… Erika breaks in:
“Now your brain is getting thin.”

[/tanka]

[ November 04, 2001: Message edited by: smurd ]


Posted by: Traks Nov 4 2001, 05:30 PM
Can't Haiku right now
Dragon Warrior Seven
Ouchy Eyes bleeding

Posted by: Ajax Nov 4 2001, 06:10 PM
Is Piro a perv?
Erika doesn't think so.
Eat more, scrawny freak!

Posted by: Master Edward Nov 5 2001, 04:37 AM
Piro a pervert?
Turn to Shoujo Manga
there is the answer!

[/haiku]
Sorry this just occured to me when I asked myself, what is Kimiko reading in panel 5?
[haiku]


Posted by: Master Edward Nov 5 2001, 04:41 AM
A klattering plate -
Just Dinner invitation
Or a hidden threat?

Posted by: Northwind Nov 5 2001, 11:12 AM
When she left her work
All happiness and kindness
The world seemed so bright

Now, scant hours later
She trudges home, as her eyes
Betray her sadness.


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