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Megatokyo Forums > Story Discussions > Haiku: [0604] - I Put Myself Here, I'll Stay Here


Posted by: AncestralHamster Sep 2 2004, 11:27 PM
Ruins of the past:
Buildings can be built anew.
Not so shattered lives.

Posted by: DCR Sep 2 2004, 11:40 PM
QUOTE (AncestralHamster)
Ruins of the past:
Buildings can be built anew.
Not so shattered lives.

As Sodona pointed out
Some things rebuild easier

But like the phoenix
Life can rise from the ashes
Of funeral pyres

Posted by: Nebulious Sep 3 2004, 12:02 AM
QUOTE (DCR @ Sep 3 2004, 12:40 AM)
As Sodona pointed out
Some things rebuild easier

But like the phoenix
Life can rise from the ashes
Of funeral pyres

Mistakes are not always scars
Some become bright plumes of hope

Posted by: masamage Sep 3 2004, 12:31 AM
One moment
As the leaves settle
And grow still

One moment
While the air is calm
And silent

Even now,
It's hard to see you
...Even now

But before
I walk away, I
Hear my voice

And my hands
Become uncertain
As I wait

Posted by: DCR Sep 3 2004, 12:35 AM
QUOTE (Nebulious)
Mistakes are not always scars
Some become bright plumes of hope

The pain of the now
Undeniably smarts and stings
But it's made to fade

Perspective makes it teacher
Never meant to be jailer


[!haiku] Had to look it up for spelling, and suprise! un∑de∑ni∑ably is only 4 syllables. [/!haiku]

Posted by: Shoka Sep 3 2004, 12:49 AM
[verse]

Grey Lady, donít you cry,
When your heart is feeling sore?
Here the shadow freighted sky
Is pressing down, but it wonít pour.
When the sun that soaked the pavings
Screams away into the night,
Does the rage that youíve been saving
Make you tremble with fright?

Grey Lady, donít you sigh,
When you think of what is past?
The regrets that you deny
Are dampened shrouds that hold you fast.
Now your eyes grow dim and shuttered,
Your expression lone and stark,
Like a candle that has guttered
Down into the dark.

Grey Lady, wonít you try
To fish your spirit from the well?
It is cool down there, but why
Canít you admit that this is hell?
Thereís a temple gate up high,
Where a bird is taking wing,
So, Grey Lady, wonít you cry
When the stone bells ring?

[/verse]

Posted by: Temenus Sep 3 2004, 01:14 AM
Determination
News of marriage settles, like
snow around her heart

/Temenus, who dislikes to continue a haiku line on the next but could not fit this one otherwise.

Posted by: Chun Sep 3 2004, 01:22 AM
Amongst A City
In Lying Eyes Of Sadness
A Heart Beats Just Once
Great Descent Of True Reason
Lost Love Missed By Cold Escape

~Chun

Posted by: masamage Sep 3 2004, 01:44 AM
[!haiku] I liked it, Temenus. The linebreak worked for you. And yours, Shoka, was lovely. We haven't had much of that sort of thing lately... It always makes me wistful for the inspiration to start a verse thread. [/!haiku]

Pausing to wonder.
The words are hard to say, but
If I don't ask now,
While the impulse is with me,
I'll realize that I can't.

Posted by: kage musouka Sep 3 2004, 03:03 AM
Holding to my words
Stones of wistful resonance
Wishing well of memories

Constant burden of courage
Fragile smiles are heaviest




[!haiku]
**/me wrings hands**
Because of all the fine work here, posting to these haiku threads is always indimidating.. but I just had to this time. Not sure if I can follow my 5-7-5 with my own 7-7. I hope I did it right.
[/!haiku]

Posted by: masamage Sep 3 2004, 05:20 AM
QUOTE (kage musouka @ Sep 3 2004, 02:03 AM)
Because of all the fine work here, posting to these haiku threads is always indimidating.. but I just had to this time. Not sure if I can follow my 5-7-5 with my own 7-7. I hope I did it right.

You did it right, and you did it very well. ^_^

QUOTE
Constant burden of courage
Fragile smiles are heaviest

Even the strongest,
Thickest crystal must shatter
If it strikes the ground.
I understand, now. Only
Once have I let myself drop.

Posted by: Nebulious Sep 3 2004, 10:01 AM
The burdened sighing
Restoring the tangible
Feels like an escape

QUOTE (DCR)
The pain of the now
Undeniably smarts and stings
But it's made to fade

Perspective makes it teacher
Never meant to be jailer
Yet those who despair
They flee from the past running
To escape shadows

Convinced flesh canít ever heal
They mourn like scarred Narcissus

QUOTE (Masamage)
Even the strongest,
Thickest crystal must shatter
If it strikes the ground.
I understand, now. Only
Once have I let myself drop.
Lessons hardest learned
Should be the ones most heeded.
Please inherit them.

Etched upon the crystal grove
Love their beauty and wisdom


[/haiku]Some very nice work from everyone today. Very enjoyabe!

*My mythology isn't very good, so I don't know if Narcissus ever became disfigured. But if he did, it's not hard to imagine what he'd be like. [haiku]

Posted by: masamage Sep 3 2004, 03:36 PM
QUOTE (Nebulious @ Sep 3 2004, 09:01 AM)
The burdened sighing
Restoring the tangible
Feels like an escape

With each lifted veil of mist
I'm that much closer to home.

[!haiku] I really liked this one, Nebulious. ^^

QUOTE
My mythology isn't very good, so I don't know if Narcissus ever became disfigured.† But if he did, it's not hard to imagine what he'd be like.

He didn't, unless you count turning into a flower, but I agree with your assessment. :) That was a wonderful metaphor. [/!haiku]

Posted by: snark Sep 4 2004, 12:44 AM
QUOTE (masamage @ Sep 3 2004, 09:36 PM)
With each lifted veil of mist
I'm that much closer to home.

But the approach tugs
On heart-strings tense and fragile
Still touched by the cold

Is this what's meant when they say
That you can't go home again?

[!haiku]I feel somewhat intimidated posting - there's so much good verse in here. The bar is set very high today, and I miss the spring in my step...[/!haiku]

Posted by: DCR Sep 4 2004, 01:12 AM
QUOTE (snark)
But the approach tugs
On heart-strings tense and fragile
Still touched by the cold

Is this what's meant when they say
That you can't go home again?


Insurmountable
Walls of fear and ghosts of past
The way home obscured

Easy to hide away from
Chance of being hurt again

Courage is defined
Gathering up broken heart
And trying once more


[!haiku]

QUOTE (snark)
I feel somewhat intimidated posting

Glad I'm not the only one.
I try, if only because running from a thread expounding upon courage and fear, the past and the future, is... ignominious.
[/!haiku]

Posted by: snark Sep 4 2004, 03:01 AM
QUOTE (DCR @ Sep 4 2004, 07:12 AM)
Insurmountable
Walls of fear and ghosts of past
The way home obscured

Easy to hide away from
Chance of being hurt again

Courage is defined
Gathering up broken heart
And trying once more

I must continue
Though grey, I'm not ready to
Answer havens' call

I must... I shall pass this test
I shall remain Erika

[!haiku]
QUOTE (DCR @ Sep 4 2004, 07:12 AM)

I try, if only because running from a thread expounding upon courage and fear, the past and the future, is... ignominious.

Not to mention somewhat ironic. happy.gif

I can't hope to match Shoka's, but...
[/!haiku]

[verse]
After stumbling in the darkness,
From the closing in of wings,
My soul's yearning for the daylight,
And the melody it brings.

Yet I still find I'm imprisoned,
By the tendrils of the past,
And I don't know what will happen,
Once this vital die is cast.

Indecision is an action,
That we do not wish to take,
But once others have the baton,
Resolution comes too late.

So now blinded by the sunlight,
Where the future meets the past,
Back in charge of my own journey,
No more flying at half mast.

Here I reclaim Hayasaka,
Though the past to me still clings,
But the dust is slowly scattered,
By the spreading of my wings,
Now my mind is fully focused,
And my heart begins to sing.
[/verse]

Posted by: masamage Sep 4 2004, 12:35 PM
Beautiful, snark-kun...

QUOTE
I must... I shall pass this test
I shall remain Erika

Is that an intentional Galadriel reference? It makes me happy.

Now you have my pencil going. Incoming fanart, I think...

Posted by: masamage Sep 4 2004, 02:31 PM
And here it is, an approximation of the image which impressed itself on my mind an hour or two ago. Inspiration comes in many forms... Thanks, snark. ^^

The text is a haiku, if you slide the second 'and' up a line and remove the 'el' I added to her name.

user posted image

Posted by: Nebulious Sep 5 2004, 02:50 PM
QUOTE (Snark)
I must continue
Though grey, I'm not ready to
Answer havens' call

I must... I shall pass this test
I shall remain Erika
I dodge the spotlight
To be a pilgrim wand'ring
Searching for my soul


[/haiku]Snark: Nice work there. I actually didn't catch the second refrence Masa pointed out. I only saw the Grey Havens one.

Masamage: Great, now I can feel even worse about my drawing ablities. With a little more detail, that would make a nice CG.

Fun fact: You've read the Silmarillion too many times when you don't even realize that 'Erikael' potentially has four slyables. tongue.gif [haiku]

Posted by: NightStrife Sep 5 2004, 04:13 PM
[sonnet=english]
The world is spinning, tossing things aloft,
And Time forgets which things were left behind.
The home She built where life could be so soft
Is comfort broken, and with past entwined.
Now dark designs have driven hearth from home
And long abandoned heart-breaks split anew;
The pain She ran away from Her life roams,
With nothing left that She can now undo.
Fate laughs and tells Her that this is Herself,
That past events define our current life.
And She tells Fate it is not Past itself
But our response that gives us peace or strife.
There are no sweet dreams that are made of this,
But She will not be daunted by abyss.
[/sonnet]

[!haiku]
Why, oh why did I pick that form? I love and hate iambic pentameter happy.gif

Lots of great stuff in this thread, great work everyone! You all put me to shame.
[/!haiku]

Posted by: AncestralHamster Sep 5 2004, 09:20 PM
QUOTE (Nebulious @ Sep 5 2004, 08:50 PM)
QUOTE (Snark)
I must continue
Though grey, I'm not ready to
Answer havens' call

I must... I shall pass this test
I shall remain Erika
I dodge the spotlight
To be a pilgrim wand'ring
Searching for my soul

Not all who wander are lost,
Not all lost things can be found.

[!haiku]
Snark: Thumbs up for the Tolkien reference.

Masamage: Nice bit of fanart. Mind, I think personalitywise Erika is a better match for Eowyn than Galadriel. A strong woman, but one with a hidden sadness and who is somewhat emotionally brittle.

Shoka: Good work.

Tenemus: Nice to see you've rejoined the haiku thread. Take off your coat and stay a while if you can. smile.gif

NightStrife: No need to run down your own work. I like sonnets; I wish I could write them. And I share your sentiments regarding iambic pentameter!

Erika's secret sorrows always draw out the best verse, and this strip has continued the tradition.

[/!haiku]

Posted by: Shoka Sep 5 2004, 11:33 PM
QUOTE (AncestralHamster)
Erika's secret sorrows always draw out the best verse, and this strip has continued the tradition.

in spades, furry one,
you devotee of long cool
women in fuku!

[!haiku]
Great verse, everyone. And a very nice piece of fanart to go with 'em. I do purely love it when a thread comes together!^^
[/!haiku]

Posted by: Lukkai Sep 6 2004, 11:33 AM
I am late!
A busy week-end
Took it's toll.


"This is my home now!
You won't see me give this up,
No matter the cost."


An impressive scene.
The knight and the paladin
Suddenly silenced.


Girl Junko
Stunned by that woman
Erika

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