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Megatokyo Forums > Story Discussions > Drabble: [414] nothing at all


Posted by: Opt498 May 26 2003, 01:34 AM
My first drabble, in widescreen genki Asako-vision!
Yuki’s here, but why does she look so down?

Is something wrong? Did someone die? I hope she’s alright. She acts funny sometimes, but she’s always been a good friend. If she’s not her normal genki self, we’ll have to cheer her up somehow.

But she says she’s fine. She doesn’t sound fine, even when she’s saying so.

You know, I read a manga like this once. Actually, it was last month. This girl, Yukari, fell in love with her art teacher, and Yuki’s acting just like she did.

Asako says it’s not the same, but I think it is.

Posted by: AncestralHamster May 26 2003, 01:39 AM
In reply to:

My first drabble, in widescreen genki Asako-vision!


I think it is the genkiness of the piece which makes me like it!

Posted by: Hisui May 26 2003, 05:32 AM
I concur. It feels quite genki.

Posted by: Opt498 May 26 2003, 11:55 AM
And only after it's too late to edit do I notice the big glaring error in the last line.

"Asako" should read "Mami".

Posted by: Brent Dax May 26 2003, 04:22 PM
Excellent job! Interesting story, correct characterization, and appropriate word count. I hope to see more from you in the future.

BTW, is anyone willing to second Opt's nomination for "Best Newbie At Anything"? ;^)

Posted by: Caduceuskun May 26 2003, 04:40 PM
I'll second that, though not only is he not really a newbie anymore, I sorta get the impression he never really has been. happy.gif BTW, Opt, have I ever mentioned how nice it is to have you around frequently again?

Posted by: Brent Dax May 26 2003, 04:45 PM
When he was a newbie at the forums, he was good at it. When he was a newbie at MT:tC, he was good at it. Now he's a newbie at drabbles, and he's good at it. That's what I mean, C-kun.

Posted by: Opt498 May 26 2003, 06:34 PM
Thanks, C-kun. I'm actually glad myself that now I can post like this and still get my homework done, but if I need to leave again, I will. I still feel bad about my contribution to the fall of MMT, and it pleases me to know that Clans will never have the same problem.

However, I do have proof that I'm not the best new person at everything I start doing, and I'm not going to accept any such title: (add one dose of http://forums.megatokyo.com/showflat.php?Cat=&Board=UBB4&Number=1246405&page=0&view=collapsed&sb=5&o=7&fpart=1, and scroll up to see my glaring too late to edit error in the last line of my drabble)

I was a n00b once, and I took my lumps. It just wasn't here, and I've matured since. The boards where I started RPing are long gone now, but I started out with a bunch of godmoders, started godmoding myself, and then the entire thread collapsed because everyone was doing it.

Ever since then, I've built my characters to be strong in thinking and weak in ass-kicking. It seems to be working. </way off topic>

Posted by: Keita-chan May 27 2003, 02:48 PM
Here's a Yuki-vision drabble! With super-depressed action!
[HTML divider line]
Hmm...school starts soon. I wonder where Mami and Asako are...they aren't usually late.

Well, that answers that question...they were standing right behind me.

I wonder what Asako's problem is today...I really am fine...though I'm still kind of sad that Piro-sensei forgot my lesson yesterday.

Well, that's Mami...always butting in. Why can't she just leave me alone? It'd be really nice of her.

Could I have a crush on Piro-sensei? I don't think so...I don't even know his last name! And why does Mami think it's so obvious that I do?

Mami's right, life isn't like shoujo manga. Hmm, I wonder...
[Another HTML divider line]
This is only my second drabble, so sorry if it's a bit rough around the edges.

EDIT: Some formatting from Word I had to correct.

Posted by: McFinnigan May 27 2003, 03:06 PM
Yuki:
--
The air is chill today. Suits my mood, really.

I feel so... stupid. Yes, that's the word. Stupid, useless, pathetic, plain Yuki.

Why does he keep on lying to me? He turned off his phone.
I tried to phone him so many times last night.

Why didn't he just say that I'm not worthy to be taught by him? Why all these lies?
This is so unfair. All I wanted was a chance. His art work is so amazing.
I was stupid to aspire to be anything. I should know my place. That sort of gift is not meant for me.

--

McF

Posted by: nuvan May 27 2003, 03:23 PM
Excellent McF. You've really captured Yuki in this one.

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